


A few first dates

by Simbanrat



Category: EastEnders (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Romance, First Meetings, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-19
Updated: 2020-07-02
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:47:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 31,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24807205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Simbanrat/pseuds/Simbanrat
Summary: Just slighting ripping off the concept of '50 first dates'.Ben has a head injury and can't make any short term memories. Callum keeps meeting him and hoping he'll end up remembering him.As I'm writing it I'm realising it's more angst than rom com like the film was. I apologise, I'm just an angst lover.
Relationships: Callum "Halfway" Highway/Ben Mitchell
Comments: 110
Kudos: 146





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I don't own either the original film concept or Ballum... shame 😂.
> 
> I'm not a doctor, this head injury is fictional. I don't claim to know if someone can recover from it etc. It's all for the story 👍.

Callum Highway moved to Walford a few months ago. He needed a fresh start after being discharged on medical grounds from the army. There was a whole story there, but it wasn’t something he liked to talk about. His past was his past and anything painful that fell within that time could stay there. He’d spoken about it once to his ex girlfriend, about the explosion and him being unable to save somebody, but once he’d allowed himself to speak about it out loud he decided it didn’t achieve anything to think about it again. 

He’d met Whitney the day he moved into the Vic, she was working as a barmaid there. He knew the Carters from years back, they were like a surrogate family to him as his own weren’t the type of family you would choose for yourself. When he’d rung Mick up to tell him about leaving the army, straight away the man offered him a place to stay and a job. The family had always had a soft spot for the young man who was the kid brother of Mick’s best friend when he was younger. He had since lost contact with Stuart, but he’d always tried to stay in contact with Callum, wanting him to know he was always welcome in their home. 

Whitney set her eyes on Callum as soon she met him. In her past she’d always ricocheted from one man the next, never quite being able to hang onto a relationship or constantly making bad choices. She’d even been married to one of he Carter kids at one point and when she met Callum she saw a cute, friendly and kind guy. Who wouldn’t be interested in getting to know him more. They went on a few dates and Whitney was understanding and patient with Callum when she found out he was a virgin. They slept together for the first time a month after they met, and as soon as it was over Callum knew for certain that he didn’t like women in that way. 

Whitney was upset but by that point they hadn’t had a chance to develop feelings for each other properly so she wrote it off as another failed relationship. She was happy to be his friend though, Callum was such a nice guy he was easy to stay friends with. It was because of Whitney that Callum started to seek out men to date. She acted like his wing man, encouraging him to get out there and find someone. She enjoyed the gay scene as much as he did, visiting The Prince Albert together on their nights off from the pub. They both loved the music and atmosphere of the bar, and Whitney found it reassuring to be in a place where she didn’t feel like she was being hit on every time a guy wanted to talk to her. 

Callum settled into his job, home and new lifestyle with ease. He might have been a latecomer and a baby gay, but Callum’s lack of experience was made up with his enthusiasm. If he chose to, he pulled each time he went out, either going back to their place or taking them home to the Vic. There were a few awkward moments in the mornings as his latest conquest left his room, Linda feeling a little embarrassed, but it was never a problem really as they loved Callum and had told him to make himself at home. Callum found himself wondering why he’d wasted so much time, not losing his virginity until he was 28 and denying who he really fancied in his life up until then. 

Now Callum knew who he was he was confident and outgoing, before when he was trying to deny his true self he came across as goofy and dorky, not wanting to draw attention to himself. The first time Whit had insisted they go out on the pull, she gave him a makeover, she threw out his favourite beanie hats and bought him a new shirt. Callum looked in the mirror and was surprised by how different a change of clothes and a haircut could make him look but also how different it made him feel too. Callum realised that now he was finally being himself and he would always love and appreciate Whitney for helping him to be who he was always meant to be. 

So whenever Callum and Whit went out to the Albert, it was an unspoken rule that Callum wanted to get laid. He was always a gentleman about things and it was an agreement between them both that Callum would always make sure that Whit got home safe, no matter where Callum ended up. On this particular night, Callum was on his way back to this guy’s, David he thought his name was, place. En route to his flat Callum insisted they walk Whitney home first. Callum and Whitney walked with linked arms, stumbling along the road with David walking along behind them, the guy had wanted to get Callum back to his as soon as he could and was annoyed at the detour, but he was very much enjoying the view of his new friend’s arse as his eyes kept drifting down as he walked in front. 

When they dropped the girl off at her aunt’s (or sister or whatever, David didn’t care) house, David had Callum pinned up against the wall as soon as the door was shut after Whitney went in. Callum responded immediately, returning the hard kiss, clashing their teeth together and the hard crotch of other man digging impatiently into his thigh. Neither of them thought they were going to make it back to the flat and Callum felt a hand heading towards his flies and groaned at the contact as his zip was beginning to be opened. Just then the front door opened again and Whit shooed them off the doorstep, telling them to go get a room while she laughed. Callum flushed pink and David thought it made him all the hotter. 

In the end they ended up back at the Vic, it was closer than David’s flat and after the near miss outside Whitney’s house it seemed a much better option. Callum was still asleep when David got up to leave and he stirred enough to turn over so his was facing away from the door as the other man crept out and left the pub. When he woke in the morning he was surprised the bed was empty, he knew it was a one night stand and was OK with that, but usually the men he took back with him at least stayed until the morning. As much as Callum enjoyed a casual shag, he did still like to wake up next to somebody, that was the only thing he missed about being with Whitney. Not the sex of course, but before they had sex they used to share a bed just to sleep. He missed the feeling of being close to somebody and waking up with their arms thrown over him. He wanted that again someday, but actually with somebody he could see a future with and someone he genuinely cared about. 

When he got up he walked into the kitchen to be greeted by Mick and Linda, already in the middle of cooking breakfast and when he entered the room they offered him a bacon sandwich which he gratefully accepted, his head a little sore from the drinks he’d had the night before and he had a craving for some grease. 

“So did we hear you bring someone home last night?” Mick asked

“Yeah” Callum offered in response

“Will he be joining us for breakfast?” Linda enquired nosily

“Nah, he left already” Callum admitted a little disappointed 

Both of the Carters had been a bit surprised when Callum started to bring home random guys. They didn’t care that he was gay, their own son Johnny was also gay, but Callum had never struck them as the sort to be into casual sex and hook ups. They always imagined him to be a hearts and flowers type of person, who would wine and dine a potential partner. So to see him with a different guy every night, it didn’t seem that it would make the younger man happy. The look on Callum’s face now told them they might be right. 

“You know I could set you up with a friend’s son” Linda offered hopefully

“It’s fine, thanks though” Callum said as Linda placed the bacon sarnie down in front of him. He picked it up and took a bite, thankful for the fact he lived with people who cared enough to include him in their family and who knew him well enough to know he liked brown sauce in his sandwiches. The sauce and grease from the bacon oozed out of the bread and dripped down his chin and onto the plate. Both Mick and Linda laughed as Callum’s tongue darted out and licked as far down his chin as it would reach, thankful that this version of their favourite Highway was still a little bit dopey. 

A few days later Callum asked Whitney if she wanted to go out to the Albert again but she had a date. He was really pleased for her, she deserved a chance at happiness and when she told him about this Leo guy, he sounded really great. So that night Callum decided to fly solo. He dressed in a shirt and skinny jeans, knowing that his arse and thighs were one of his best features, or at least that’s what a lot of the men he’d been with had told him. 

Around 9pm he set off for the bar, walking in he observed the place and tried to see if there was anyone that was taking his fancy. He noticed a few people that he recognised, Walford was a small place and there were only so many gay guys who lived in and around the area. Callum knew he’d slept with a few of the men there tonight so he actively avoided trying to talk to any of them, clearly they were only interested in one night stands since he had never had a repeat performance with any of them. He walked to the bar and ordered himself a drink and while he was waiting he turned around and leaned against it to continue surveying the room. 

As the bartender put his drink down on the bar, Callum went to turn back to him and pick it up when he spotted someone walk into the place. It was someone he hadn’t seen before, average height, light brown hair, blue eyes, a handsome face and a swagger he liked the look of. He was with a skinny ginger guy and Callum hoped to a god he didn’t believe in that this guy wasn’t his boyfriend. But what were the chances that this cute guy was single, especially as he seemed to be pretty familiar with the guy he was with. 

Callum got his drink and made sure to track where cute guy got to, watching as him and his companion went to a table in the corner. Cutie sat down while ginger came to the bar to get their drinks and Callum took the opportunity to go over to talk to him while the other man’s back was turned. Callum walked over to the table and his breath caught as he got closer to the man, his handsome face getting better looking and his eyes more blue the closer Callum got to them. As he approached him the other man looked up at him, a neutral expression on his face as the stranger got closer. Callum smiled and the seated man checked him out for a few seconds and then smiled back. 

“Is that your boyfriend at the bar?” Callum asked loudly to be heard over the music as he pointed towards ginger at the bar. He laughed hard and Callum thought it was just about the most infectious laugh he’d ever heard. It took the man so long to stop laughing that by the time he was ready to answer Callum, the other man was returning with their drinks and he put them down on the table as he eyed up the man with a suspicious look on his face. 

“Jay, this guy was just asking me if you were my boyfriend” Cutie said as he laughed again. Callum was lost as to why the question was so funny as ginger started to laugh too. Callum just stared at them both confused and considered turning around and walking away when cutie managed to compose himself and actually answer him. 

“Jay’s my brother, or as good as” Ben said and then Callum laughed a little bit too and could see why his question made the other men laugh and he was relieved that the guy wasn’t his boyfriend. Jay sat down at the table and took a sip of his drink as cutie picked his drink up to have a gulp too, keeping his eyes on Callum as he did so and Callum watched as he swallowed the liquid down. He gulped himself as he watched the other man swallow and stuck his hand out in the other man’s direction. 

“I’m Callum” he announced, “can I buy you another drink?” 

Cutie put his pint down on the table and considered the other man for a minute, chewing on his bottom lip thoughtfully while Callum watched him. Then he released the lip from his teeth and smiled as he put his hand out to meet Callum’s. 

“I’m Ben, and yes you can” he said as their hands met and they both felt a little spark go off. 


	2. Chapter 2

It was a little bit awkward to start with. While Jay and Ben were working on their pints, Callum went to the bar to get a round of shots in. He carried them back over to the table and placed them down in front of the two men. He hoped that once Jay had a shot he would wonder off and leave them alone to talk, but instead Jay stayed close to Ben and didn’t leave his side for most of the night, just disappearing once for a drink run and once for the toilet. 

But as Callum talked to them both he enjoyed their company. They bounced off each other perfectly and Callum thought he ended up seeing more of the man Ben really was with his brother next to him than he might have if he was just chatting him up in a bar alone. He still wished he could have Ben to himself for more a minute or two though, there was something about him that he was instantly attracted to and he wanted to know a lot more. 

Callum found out that Ben lived locally and that his mum owned the bar they were in. He found it incredible that how much time he spent there he hadn’t met Ben before. He lived and worked in such a small area it was weird he had never ran into him when he was out and about, especially as his mum ran the cafe on Bridge Street too. Ben told him that he didn’t get to go out much, he spent a lot of his free time with his daughter and Callum was very surprised by the news. It turned out that when Ben was a teenager he slept with his friend to check if he was gay or not and apparently they were both as stupid as each other and didn’t even think about contraception. 

“I wouldn’t change it for the world though, she’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. Even if it feels like I’m looking at a new person everyday the way she’s growing up so fast” Ben said. Callum noticed that when Ben talked about his daughter his eyes came alive and if possible they got even more blue. He could get lost in those eyes easily if he let himself. Ben became so animated as he spoke about Lexi, how much of a little madam she was and how she was perfect blend of her mum and dad. Callum wondered what it felt like to love somebody that much. 

Ben was handsome and the more Callum spoke to him, the more he was attracted to him. He was engaging and friendly. But he was also cheeky and really flirty, making his brother blush on more than occasion with a suggestive comment. Jay rolled his eyes a number of times at some of the things Ben was saying during the time they spent together but didn’t make a move to leave at all and while Callum liked the guy, he really wanted to get Ben alone. They’d been talking and flirting for a couple of hours and Callum felt himself falling for the other man already. 

It was Ben’s turn to get a round in and he went off to the bar leaving Callum and Jay at the table. Callum looked at the other man and smiled, but he wasn’t smiling back at him. Instead he had an unreadable look on his face and his eyes looked hard. Callum didn’t know what he’d done wrong, a minute ago when Ben was there they were all laughing and joking together. 

“Ben’s not available” Jay said harshly. 

“What do you mean?”

“He’s not going home with you”

Callum was shocked, sure he wanted to shag Ben, who in their right mind wouldn’t, and Callum was more than happy to go home with someone the same night he met them, after all most of his hooks up happened after less than an hour of talking with somebody. But it was unexpected to be cock blocked by a guy’s brother. 

“What?” Callum asked incredulous

“You can’t fuck him”

Callum’s eyes widened in surprise, completely taken aback by what the other man was saying to him. He was starting to get a really creeped out feeling about all this, wondering if there was some weird twisted relationship going on between them. Callum knew now that while Ben had introduced Jay as his brother they weren’t actually related. Maybe Jay had a thing for Ben and now he was warning Callum off him. But why had they laughed so hard when Callum had suggested that when he first met them. He was feeling so confused and freaked out at the situation and as he was about to ask Jay what was going on a small platinum blonde haired girl came over to join them out of nowhere. 

“Hi hun” she said as she sat down next to Jay and and kissed him on the mouth. She put her hand under his hand on his lap and threaded their fingers together. Jay broke away from talking to Callum to smile at her “Hey, Ben’s at the bar if you want to go get a drink”and the girl kissed Jay on the cheek as she got up to go join Ben at the bar. Callum was really confused now, just as he started to think he had things figured out with Jay and Ben being a thing, now this blonde girl has thrown him, making his head hurt. 

“Just believe me Callum. Nothing good will come out of it if you pursue him”

“I don’t think that’s your decision to make Jay”

“Seriously, you have to trust me on this, it’s a bad idea”

Just then Ben and the girl came back to sit at the table, each carrying two drinks and she sat in the chair Ben had been in while Ben then relocated to the seat next to Callum. They were on a bench and Ben sat so close that he was touching Callum, whether it was on purpose or not Callum couldn’t tell. He looked at Ben and thanked him for the drink, noticing up close how many freckles the other man had across his nose and finding them completely adorable. They were sat so close to each other that Callum could almost count the freckles and it felt like if either of them moved a little bit their mouths would be close enough to touch. 

Callum felt himself being pulled by and invisible force towards the other man, wanting to kiss him, and he could see that Ben was leaning in towards him too. Callum moved in, feeling Ben’s breath on his face and feeling the butterflies starting in his stomach. Their lips were mere centimetres apart but then suddenly there was a drink being knocked over and Callum ended up covered in a freezing cold cocktail, ice cubes and all. They jumped apart and looked down at their laps, most of it had gone over Callum but a few drops landed on Ben too. Blondie passed Ben a napkin and he dabbed at the little bit of liquid on him and Callum excused himself to go to the toilet to clean himself up. 

He walked into the loo to grab some tissues and tried to soak the worst of the mess off him. He ended up trying to hold his crotch under the hand dryer and got an odd look from somebody who walked in to use the urinals. Callum nodded at him and the other man nodded back before turning to the wall and having a piss. Callum continued the best he could to clean himself up and after five minutes decided it wasn’t going to get any better. He had a quick wee before he washed his hands and checked himself out in the mirror. He stared at himself and tried to work out what the hell had gotten into Jay and wondered why he was so against Callum getting to know Ben better. He was sure that the drink had been pushed over on him on purpose but he couldn’t work out why. 

Callum opened the door to leave the toilets and headed back towards the table they were sitting at but when he got there it was full of strangers. He went up to them and asked where the others had gone and they said the table was empty when they got there. Callum was so dumbfounded, he’d only been gone for ten minutes tops and in that time Ben disappeared. What the hell was the reason Jay warned him off and why have they all now vanished! 


	3. Chapter 3

Callum thought about Ben for days after that night in the Albert. Usually he’d meet someone, go home with them and then not give them another thought, but this time, he hadn’t even got so far as to kiss the guy and he couldn’t get him out of his mind. Maybe it was because he hadn’t done anything with him and he was the one that got away, maybe it was the warning from Jay to back off, or perhaps it was the disappearing act. All Callum knew was that the combination of it all made him even more intrigued by the other man and all the more determined to try and run into him again. 

Callum went back to the Albert for the next three nights hoping to run into Ben again, each time nursing a pint at the bar facing the door in case he happened to walk in. A few men tried to approach him, but Callum politely declined all of their advances, which was tough because one of them was particularly cute. Not Ben cute though, he had the wrong coloured eyes, his hair was too long and he didn’t have the freckles that were dotted across Ben’s nose.

Every night at the bar was a waste of time, there was no sign of Ben, Jay or the blonde that came in to join them, it was like they vanished or Callum had imagined them to start with. Maybe he did, Ben seemed so perfect that he could have been a figment of Callum’s mind, a man that never really existed except in Callum’s imagination, fabricating the perfect guy to talk to. 

After the third night in the bar he decided to give up. He felt like he was going to go mad if he kept searching and figured that if it was meant to be then he would run into Ben again without needing to try. A week later he and Whit decided to go out, things hadn’t worked out between her and Leo so she was available to go out with him again. They went to the Albert as usual, their go to place. Callum hadn’t hooked up with anyone for well over a week and he’d been feeling an unsatisfied itch ever since that night he met Ben. He had in his mind that he was definitely going to be on the pull and Whit was more than happy to come along for the ride as long as Callum was buying the drinks. 

When they walked in Callum didn’t see anybody who took his fancy straight away, so he settled down with Whitney to have a few drinks, people watch and catch up with his best friend. She told him all about Leo, that he seemed a little too keen and the eagerness turned her off. He tried to ring her a couple of times but she blocked him and hadn’t heard from him since. She wasn’t that bothered though and Callum reassured her that the perfect guy was out there for her and she’d find him someday. Callum was loving being out with his friend again, the last few times he’d been out without her it was no fun. She was everything a gay guy could want in a best friend. She was warm and friendly but had the dirtiest laugh he has ever heard. People were drawn to her and she conversed easily with all the usual clientele of the gay bar. Callum knew he landed on his feet when he met her, not only for her understanding of the whole being gay thing but by being such a good friend after things didn’t work out between them. 

The night was drawing on, Callum and Whitney were both getting merry with the drinks and eventually a guy caught Callum’s eye. He spotted him on the dance floor and smiled, encouraging the other man over to talk to him. The guy didn’t take much encouragement and soon he was sat next to Callum with his hand on his knee and whispering in his ear to ask if he wanted to get out of there. Callum was about to say yes, he was starting to shuffle in his seat with his trousers beginning to feel tight from the way the other guy’s hand was moving upwards towards his groin. But then something caught his eye and he turned to the door to see Ben walk in. 

Callum’s breath caught, thinking Ben looked even better than he remembered and he was secretly pleased that he wasn’t going mad and the man was real after all. Whitney and the guy he was with noticed his sudden distraction, staring at something across the room and ignoring everything they were saying. He brushed the hand off of his leg and stood up to go over to where Ben was, leaving them looking at each other confused while he walked away. As he got closer to Ben he noticed he was with the blonde girl from the last time and as he approached them she turned to look at him. 

Callum wasn’t entirely sure what the look she was giving him was, but it wasn’t as hard as the one he had gotten from Jay and he was thankful that the man wasn’t there as well. He stood in front of Ben and smiled a bright smile, drawing one in return from the other man as well as a confused look on his face and his eyes flicked to his friend asking her something silently. 

“Where did you go the other night?” Callum asked but Ben just looked at him like he was speaking in another language. “I went to the loo and you disappeared on me” 

“Not me mate”

“Last week” 

“I’ve never met ya before, you must av got me confused with someone else” Ben said as he tuned to his friend with a ‘can you believe this guy’ look on his face. 

“Ben, we were here last week, you me and Jay” Callum said genuinely confused, Ben returned his look seemingly just as confused and then decided that going for a drink wasn’t such a good idea. He motioned to the blonde that he wanted to go and she nodded before they both turned to leave. Callum went to reach out and touch at Ben’s arm to get his attention but his friend spun round to face him, hissing “leave it” at him before turning back and continuing on out the door with Ben, causing Callum to pull his hand back as if he had been burnt. 

Callum stood utterly bewildered watching as the two of them walked out of the bar and disappeared from his view. Whitney came up to stand next to him to ask what happened and Callum didn’t have a clue what to say. That wasn’t somebody pretending to not remember to play hard to get and nor was it an attempt to brush him off. Ben looked at him as though he’d never met him before and it sent a chill through his body. He felt so sure there was a connection there, before the drink had gone flying they were that close to kissing, how could Ben not even have a flicker of recognition when he saw him again. 

“You can’t win them all Callum” Whitney tried to comfort him, “that guy is still over there waiting for you” she said to try and cheer him up. Callum was still looking at the door where Ben had left and was in a little world of his own until Whitney nudged him to get his attention again. 

“Huh?” He said as he looked at her 

“that guy is still over there waiting for you”

Callum looked over to where they’d been sitting and saw the guy that only 10 mins before he was about to go home with. He suddenly looked less attractive but since Ben wasn’t going to happen he might as well go back to plan A. He went back over with Whitney and sat down, carrying on where they left off with the bloke rubbing his hand further and further up Callum’s leg. Eventually they all left together, Callum dropping Whitney off first before taking Sam, the guy, back to the Vic. 

The sex was good, Sam knew what he was doing and they both got off. He stayed the night and in the morning even had a cup of tea with Mick and Linda before heading off, leaving a number for Callum in case he wanted to hook up again. When Linda chatted to Callum later she asked him if he thought he was going to see him again, Callum was non committal replying with just a “maybe” and Linda said that she thought he seemed nice, “yeah he was” Callum agreed. He was nice, a great lay and was into Callum. But he wasn’t Ben. He knew he needed to try and work out what was going on and wanted to track down the man that had been stuck in his thoughts since the moment he set eyes on him. There was definitely a story to be told there. 


	4. Chapter 4

Callum remembered that Ben’s mum owned the cafe as well and the gay bar, so he decided that there might be a good place to start. The next morning he declined the offer of a fry up from Linda when he woke up, instead deciding to go and have breakfast out. He threw on some clothes, grabbed his wallet and phone and hoped for the best. In the months he’d lived Walford he’d only been in this cafe once or twice and when he had it was to get a coffee on his way home from someone else’s flat after a night out. 

He walked in and saw a man in his fifties stood behind the counter, that definitely wasn’t Kathy but maybe he knew where to find her. He went over and ordered and paid for a coffee and fried breakfast before asking the man if he knew where Kathy was. He looked at Callum curiously and asked what he wanted to know for. Callum froze for a minute, not thinking far enough ahead that he would need a non-weird sounding reason to talk to the woman, he didn’t think ‘I want to shag her son’ was a wholesome enough excuse to be tracking her down for, but then his brain clicked into gear. 

“It’s about the Albert, I heard she owned it and thought I could find her here. I’m after a job”

The man seemed to consider him for a minute before asking “I thought you worked at the pub” which Callum nodded his agreement to. 

“I do, but I’m always after more hours ain’t I” he said with a dopey grin. 

“Hmmm” the guy pondered, “I guess, Mum should be here in about half an hour if you hang around long enough”

Callum’s eyes widened, mum? Was this guy Ben’s brother? 

“Do you know Ben?”

And then the guy had the same look on his face that most of the people around Ben seemed to have, instantly closing himself off and taking on a hard edge. 

“What do you want Ben for?” He asked cynically 

“I met him at the Albert the other week, he told me his mum owned the place, I thought he could put a word in for me with her” Callum managed to lie, thinking on his feet with quick ease. 

The man behind the counter didn’t look convinced, but didn’t seem to be overly paranoid of Callum since his story didn’t sound too outlandish.

“Ben don’t know you to put a word in, but my mum will be here soon if you want to ask her about a job. I’ll bring your food over to you” he said making it clear the conversation was over. Callum went and sat at the table in the corner, watching the people coming and going while he waited for his breakfast. Feeling a weird sense of dread over the whole Ben situation. He wondered what he was getting himself into, Ben himself pretty much blanked him and all his family and friends seemed to be really on edge around him. What the hell was the secret all about. 

The guy brought his breakfast over and plonked it on the table, no service with a smile from him as he trundled back to the counter. Callum tucked into his food and enjoyed it a lot, mentally making a note that he would come eat here more often. There was nothing wrong with Linda’s cooking but sometimes it would be nice to sit down and eat without being asked questions about who he’d brought home and what he was doing that night. There was never any judgement but he didn’t necessarily want to be talking about that sort of thing with people who were basically like his surrogate parents. 

When Callum finished his breakfast he pushed the plate to one side and leaned back in his chair, just as an older woman walked in and went behind the counter. He suddenly sat up straighter and noticed as the guy started talking to her. Callum couldn’t hear exactly what they were saying as there was quiet music playing in the cafe, making overhearing other people’s conversations difficult, but at one point he pointed in Callum’s direction so he assumed he was telling her about him looking for her. They both looked over at him and she had the same guarded look on her face as the others and Callum felt his hopes of finding out about Ben slipping away. The woman who he assumed was Kathy walked over to him, a smile on her face but it didn’t look genuine. 

“Were you looking for me luv… or Ben?” 

Callum was busted and looked a little bit guilty and looked down at the table while Kathy sat down in the chair opposite him. She was still smiling at him but it seemed to be a little more real now, maybe even a bit sympathetic. 

“I met him and Jay at the Albert, but when I went to the toilet they disappeared. I thought we were getting on and then it all just got weird. I can’t stop thinking about him” Callum admitted honestly. “Im not a weirdo or anything, but I really felt something and then he was gone”. He shrugged and continued, “his friends acted really weird with me, warning me off and telling me to leave him alone and I wanted to make sure he was OK and there wasn’t anything wrong”. 

“I’m guessing it was Jay warning you off”

“Yeah, and a blonde girl”

“That’s Lola, she’s Jay’s girlfriend, but she’s also the mother of Ben’s daughter” 

“She’s Lexi’s mum?”

“Yeah, they are all really good friends. The thing is…” Kathy was searching for his name. 

“Callum” 

“The thing is Callum, Ben has issues. Not just your regular run of the mill issues. All any of us want to do is to protect and help him”

“What is it?” 

Callum could see her Kathy was getting upset, there was obviously something serious going on and he was beginning to get worried about what it could be and questioning why he was getting himself involved in all this. He could walk away now and never have to think about Ben again, but could he though. He reached out his hand and placed it on top of Kathy’s to reassure her it was ok to talk to him. She looked up at him with tear filled eyes and Callum’s stomach lurched, really scared about what he was about to be told. 

“Ben has a head injury. He has amnesia”

“Right?” 

“But it’s his short term memory, he can’t remember anything after a day. His mind can’t make new memories and when he goes to sleep at the end of the day he wakes up and to him it’s a year ago, the day before the accident where he banged his head. It’s like every day resets itself”

Callum looked at her stunned, it sounded ridiculous and completely made up, but it would explain things. The way Ben looked at him as if he were a total stranger, his friends being fiercely protective of him. He remembered the way Ben spoke about his daughter and how much she seems to grow every day. She’s growing because the last time he saw her she was a year younger. Callum’s mouth dropped open and he was trying to process the information as Kathy continued to talk to him and tell him all the details of the accident and what the doctors say. When she finished explaining the best she could Callum just nodded at her and looked down at the table. 

“You see why Jay was warning you off. He can never have a relationship with somebody because when he wakes up with them in the morning it would be next to a stranger”

“But that’s so sad” Callum said with tears in his eyes, to never have a relationship, to always wake up alone, it was heartbreaking, 

“So he doesn’t know about the amnesia?”

“We tried telling him a few times, but he freaked out so much it seemed kinder to not tell him the truth”

“But what happens when Lexi gets older? He’s going to wake up someday and his 7 year old is going to be a teenager” 

“I don’t know Callum, we’re hoping his brain will kick itself back into shape. The doctor said that with this type of trauma the mind can right itself. We’re just hoping that happens before it gets to that stage”. 

Callum didn’t know what to think. He knew this was a weird situation and it would be so easy to walk away but he truly felt something when he met Ben, something he had never felt before and he wasn’t sure he was able to give up on it so easily. 

“It would probably be better for you to not try and talk to him again Callum, you seem like a sweet boy and I don’t want you to get hurt. Ben can’t offer you anything right now, there is no future with him”

It hurt Callum to hear how Ben’s whole life has been written off. 

“I thought you said there’s a chance his memory could recover?”

“It’s just a maybe, most likely it’s never going to happen. We’re just hoping for the best”

Callum took a minute to think, wondering what to do for the best but then he knew deep down what he wanted to do. He told Kathy that he wasn’t ready to walk away, he wanted to get to know Ben and see what happened. Surely she wanted her son to be happy and wasn’t it worth giving it a go? She agreed but emphasised that she was worried about Callum, being forgotten about everyday was going to be painful. Callum didn’t doubt it but he was willing to at least try.


	5. Chapter 5

“So he doesn’t remember anything?” Whitney was asking completely bewildered. 

“He remembers before the accident perfectly, he just can’t remember anything he did before he wakes up in the morning”

“Callum this is mad”

“I know” 

“Why are you so determined to do this?”

“I don’t know Whit, there was just something about him. I can’t explain it”

Whitney looked at him sympathetically. She was worried about her friend, he was such a nice guy and he wore his heart on his sleeve. He might have been sleeping around since he came out but he’d admitted to her after a night out, laying in bed in the early hours of the morning, facing each other and using the comfort of the dark and alcohol to speak the truth, that all he wanted was to love and be loved in return. He was really just a romantic whose heart was there for breaking. And she was worried that this Ben guy was going to break it, even if it wasn’t intentional. 

After Callum spoke to Kathy he came back to the Vic, patiently waited until the clock struck 12 and then poured himself a pint. Now he was on fourth pint and trying to talk to Whitney about what he was getting himself involved with. Kathy had tried her hardest to convince him not to pursue Ben, she knew how hard it was having to live with his condition and how much it hurt that he couldn’t remember his day to day life anymore. Anything Lexi does is forgotten, Kathy explained that she did a talent show, Ben was so proud and excited watching it, but in the morning when Lexi asked him if he enjoyed it he thought she was making things up. Lexi had been heartbroken and so had Ben when she showed him a picture of herself on Lola’s phone, sitting on Ben’s knee in her costume and them both smiling but he had no memory of it at all. 

“I know it’s going to be hard Whit, but I just don’t think I can stay away. I really felt something that night, I know he did too”

Whitney got up and moved across to where Callum was sitting, put her arms around him and gave him a big sloppy kiss on his cheek. 

“You’re a good man Callum, I hope this all works out for you”

Callum blushed slightly and hugged her back, hoping the same thing. He knew he could be in for nothing but heartbreak but he thought it was worth the risk. If you know you know and now he has Kathy on side, she was going to talk to the rest of the family and let them know about Callum. Hopefully the wall they built around him to protect him from outsiders would now have a crack for him to get through, with Ben’s loved ones behind him Callum hoped he would get the opportunity to talk to Ben again. 

The next morning Callum called Kathy and asked what the family had said about the situation and how they felt about Callum getting to know Ben. She told him they had their reservations like she did because all they wanted to do was look out for him and didn’t want to see him hurt. They wanted to meet him properly and check that his intentions were pure and he wasn’t in it for a laugh. Callum was offended by the suggestion that he thought the situation was a joke, but he understood completely that they wanted to get to know him first. He would be the same wanting to look out for somebody he loved too. 

Callum was invited to the cafe that night after closing, Ben was home looking after Lexi so Kathy, Jay and Lola could meet him in private. Callum knocked on the door and Jay answered, he walked in and the others were sitting at a table, each with a cup of tea in front of them and looking serious. Kathy motioned for Callum to sit at the empty seat at the table while Jay locked the door back up and sat on top of the table that was next to where the others were. 

There was a tense atmosphere and Callum felt suddenly nervous, meeting the family of a potential boyfriend before he had really met the boyfriend was fucking weird and Callum worried that he was in over his head after all. He eyed the door and wondered if he could just make a run for it at this point, but then Lola started to speak. 

“Look, Ben ain’t your experiment”

“I… I don’t think he….”

“He’s fragile, you can’t mess around with him”

“I don’t want to mess him around”

“He means a lot to us, he’s been through a lot”

“I know”

“You don’t know shit mate, you met him once”

Lola was getting agitated and Callum didn’t know how to respond to her. He noticed that Kathy put her hand on top of Lola’s to try and calm her down, silently reassuring her that this whole situation was based around trying to make Ben’s life better. Some of the fight seemed to leave her at the touch and she visibly relaxed as Kathy took her hand away before she continued,

“We just love him so much, we don’t want him to get hurt”

“I don’t want that either, I promise you. The night I met him I truly felt something, something I’ve never felt before. I can’t get him out of my head” 

Callum was earnest in his response, his eyes spoke the truth and Lola believed him. She smiled at him and reached her hand out to his and pulled it towards the middle of the table and held it as she looked straight in his eyes. She could see Callum was being honest and nodded slightly, silently giving her approval. Callum wondered how much Kathy had said to them before they met up with him, she must have really been on his side.

“He felt something too”

Callum spun his head around to where Jay was sitting, shocked that he’d spoken, up until that point he’d been sitting there sternly watching over everybody. Callum was surprised by what Jay said, but the others didn’t seem so surprised and he found himself wondering what Jay had told the others about that night they met in the Albert. 

“I’ve never seen him like that with anyone before, even before the accident”

Jay was looking at floor as he spoke, but he raised his head to look at Callum, wanting to make a point of what he was about to say and needing to see how Callum reacted to it. 

“Before, he never did relationships. He had hook ups, never getting to know guys or being interested in any sort of relationship with them. He’d shag someone and then move onto the next bloke, perfectly happy to live his life like that”

Callum thought that sounded a lot like how he’d been acting since he came out. He wondered what would have happened if he’d been around and met Ben back then, a quick one night stand and then see ya later. He didn’t think he’d have been able to let Ben go then either. Jay continued, 

“Even since the accident, I go with him to the Albert and make sure he’s ok. He still hooks up with guys, I just always make sure to ring him so he doesn’t fall asleep in a strange place and I tell him that I need him for some reason so he gets home. He fell asleep one time and freaked the hell out in the morning, he was terrified, I cant let that happen again”

Callum’s heart was hurting imagining Ben lost and scared, waking up next to a strange guy in a strange bed. Having no memory of how how got there and what happened. Now he was feeling scared himself, he never wanted to make him feel like that. What if Ben freaked out like that because of him? Callum was really starting to worry about his decision now. He could still walk away from all of this. 

“But that night with you…”

Callum turned his attention back to Jay, he was smiling at him. 

“I’ve never seen him talk to someone like that before. When he has one night stands he chats for like half hour and then leaves with them. With you, he wanted to talk to you, get to know you, let you know him. I saw the way he was, he wasn’t after just a hook up. I actually think he felt whatever it was that you felt”

Callum felt his heart swell and when he looked at Kathy and Lola they were smiling and looking close to tears. Lola still had her hand on Callum’s and she squeezed it a little bit as Callum smiled back at her. It sounded a lot like all of Ben’s family and loved ones were giving him their blessing and that he wasn’t crazy. There really was something between them and he hadn’t imagined it. Kathy started to talk and Callum tuned his attention back to her. 

“We all want Ben to be happy, if there’s a chance he can be that with you it has to be worth a try. But we’re warning you Callum, if you hurt him or mess him about…”

“I won’t, I promise. I would never do anything to hurt him, you have to believe me”

And she did, they all did. Callum clearly didn’t have a mean bone in his body and they all felt better about letting this stranger getting to know Ben. 


	6. Chapter 6

It had been a few days and Callum was trying to work out how to approach Ben. His family were in contact with him, offering advice and options as to how he could ‘accidentally’ run into him sometime. The problem was, as much as Callum was desperate to see him again, the more he was thinking about it the more uptight he was getting. He wanted it to be perfect, to make a good ‘first’ impression on the other man, but he was building it up so much in his head that he was psyching himself out. The pressure of not blowing it totally made him doubt himself. Eventually he stopped answering his phone when Kathy rang him or Lola text.

Whitney noticed how tense he was, so she grabbed him a beer and made him sit down in the corner of the Vic to chill out at lunchtime. There weren’t many customers and nobody had really ordered any food so as far as she was concerned it didn’t matter if Callum took an extra long break. He sat picking at the label of the bottle of beer he was drinking, pulling the slightly soggy pieces of paper off the glass and leaving them in a little pile on the table. Whitney stared curiously at him from behind the bar and when there were no customers waiting to be served she went to sit with him.

Callum looked up as Whitney sat down next to him and smiled, she smiled back and reached her hand out to put on the knee Callum was bouncing up and down, not even noticing that he was doing it. She tried to put across the way she saw things, how worried she was about the effect this could have on him and why she was so concerned. He listened intently to her, agreeing with a lot of what she was saying.

“Callum, if you’re this stressed out, maybe it would be best to leave it, nobody would blame you for bowing out. I’m not sure this is any good for you if you’re already having trouble this early on. I’m worried for you.”

Callum knew she was making sense. As much as he hated to admit it, after the initial joy and excitement of Ben’s family giving him their blessing wore off the panic set in. He worried that he’d been swept away with the romanticism of everything and it was going to be some epic love story, but in the cold light of day, he didn’t know if he could go through with it. When Jay told him that Ben had acted differently to him than anyone else he’d seen him with it really hammered it home how important it all was. If Callum fucked this up, he could fuck Ben up. He was beginning to believe that maybe it was for the best to end this whole shit show before it began. Why risk breaking Ben’s heart when he wasn’t sure he was strong enough, or brave enough to follow through. 

“Maybe you’re right Whit”

“What?” 

Whitney wasn’t expecting him to agree with her. She was scared for her friend and was worried that he was going to end up hurt, but she never expected him to think about giving up before he started. He’d seemed so determined and had come back from meeting with Ben’s loved ones with such a spring in his step, bouncing off the walls with the news that Jay reckoned Ben felt something for him too. She didn’t think she had ever seen Callum smile so brightly, his blue eyes sparkled and his dimples seemed to deepen. Looking at how defeated he looked now, she was sure it was for the best to leave it, she couldn’t bare to think of Callum hurting if this whole situation went badly. 

“You’re making the right choice Callum”

“Yeah I guess so”

“Are you going to phone Kathy?’

Callum shook his head, if he was going to be a coward, the least he could do was go tell the woman face to face. No matter how shit he felt over everything, she deserved more than a text message or garbled phone call, he had to do the decent thing and tell her in person. 

“I’m going to go talk to her now”

He said as he drained the last of his beer and slammed the bottle down on the table a little harder than he was intending to. Whitney gave his knee a squeeze and leaned forwards to give him a peck on the cheek, wishing him good luck and she hoped that it went as well as it could go. She watched as he strode to the door with purpose, grabbed the handle and froze for a second before he turned to smile back at her. Whitney noted his eyes weren’t sparking and his dimples were barely there. He pulled open the door and walked out into the grey daylight, the miserable sky mirroring how he was feeling. 

When he got outside he stood for moment, collecting his thoughts as he looked around him, the market was bustling and there was a kid running around the enclosed garden in the middle of the square. The world was continuing to move even if it felt like his was about to stop. He cursed himself for being melodramatic and said ‘idiot’ under his breath before he turned to his left to cross the market and head towards the cafe where he knew Kathy would be. 

He pushed open the door and took a couple of steps to the counter, spotting Kathy standing behind it serving somebody, she was handing him a refillable takeout cup and Callum noted it was a hideous colour and design. He was too focused on the ugly cup that he hadn’t noticed who it was that was holding it. It wasn’t until it was too late and he’d nearly bumped into the other man that he realised it was Ben, he turned to glance at Callum before he turned back to Kathy to continue talking to her. 

He stood frozen to the spot, staring at the other man and his heart started to beat a million times a minute. He’d not seen Ben for weeks, he’d almost started to think he’d made up what he looked like and thought he’d built the other man up in his mind too much. But now he was here, stood in front of him it was obvious that Callum hadn’t been imagining anything. Ben was nearly exactly as he remembered, perhaps even better looking in the daylight. His eyes were a lighter blue than he thought, and he had an adorable birthmark on his cheek he didn’t notice the last time but other than that his memory had served him well. 

Callum also had the exact same feeling as he did the last time. The butterflies were going mental in his stomach and his hands were suddenly sweaty. He tried to speak but nothing came out and then Ben was turning towards him, looking him directly in the face. It was only a split second but the other man looked at him as if he was crazy and his eyebrows raised up before he ducked his head down and stepped around Callum and was then heading towards the door. Callum wanted to say something, wanted to reach out and stop him but nothing would move or work. Before he knew it Ben had walked out the cafe, the door closed behind him seemingly slamming shut with a loud bang but Callum thinks he imagined it sounded louder than it really was. 

When Ben was safely out of his vicinity Callum could suddenly move again and he brought his hands up to cover his face and cringed at how ridiculous he acted. Kathy watched the whole exchange and was looking at the tall man with sympathy. She could see he was beating himself up with how he handled the meeting and didn’t want to say anything to make him feel any worse. 

“I’m such a twat” he chastised himself, groaning through his fingers and rubbing his face and eyes a little too hard so that when he took them away his eyesight was slightly blurry. He looked at Kathy and as she started to come back into focus she asked him if he was OK. 

“That was….”

“Yeah it wasn’t very smooth love” she chuckled softly reaching out to touch his hand to reassure him she understood. Callum came over to tell her that he wasn’t going to be able to do this but within a second of seeing Ben again he fell apart. Now more than ever he knew he couldn’t walk away, anybody who made him feel this way was worth fighting for. No matter how scared he felt, how worried he was that he was going to make a mess out of everything it would be worth it to feel those butterflies again. In his 28 years he’d never felt like that over anybody or anything, he couldn’t turn away and ignore it. 

“Can you tell Jay to take Ben to the Albert tonight?” Callum asked Kathy, he was determined this was going to happen. The first time he met him it was there, there was a spark and they hit it off, it seems logical to make that the place to meet him again. She agreed immediately and told him she’d get Jay to text him to confirm it was all ok. Callum ended up buying one of the hideous cups which was filled with a hot chocolate hoping to calm his nerves for that evening. 

He left the cafe and walked back over to the Vic, stopping when he noticed Ben had stopped to talk to someone outside the Minute Mart. He tried not to stare and instead continued on his journey back to the pub, pushing open the door and walking straight to the door that led to the back. Whitney spotted him walk in and rushed to meet him as he was about to head up the stairs. 

“So? How did it go? Was Kathy ok about it?”

“I’m meeting Ben tonight at the Albert, you’re coming with me” 

Callum hurried off upstairs to pick out the perfect outfit while Whitney looked open mouthed up the stairs after him, confused as hell how he could change his mind so quickly. He’d only been gone for 10 minutes. 


	7. Chapter 7

It took Callum ages to pick out the perfect thing to wear, Whitney had followed him upstairs to enquire after the sudden U turn and when she saw how excited and animated he was after running into Ben again she realised there was no point in trying to talk him out of it. Her best friend was clearly smitten and by seeing Ben again it merely confirmed that what he felt the first time wasn’t a fluke and he wasn’t misremembering the feeling he had. She decided she needed to be a good friend and support him in whatever way he needed her to, even if she still secretly worried it was all going to end in tears. 

She helped him to pick out a shirt that brought out the colour of his eyes, a gorgeous shade of blue that almost matched them perfectly and a pair of skin tight jeans. “No man can resist your arse in these bad boys” she remarked as he handed him the trousers. She couldn’t help but look at it herself when he wore them and she was just a tiny bit bitter that he has a better bum than she does. 

Callum’s phone beeped to alert him that he had a text message and he eagerly clicked it open to see that it was from Jay. He confirmed that he would make sure Ben got to the club tonight and gave him a rough time of when they would make an appearance. Callum’s heart skipped a beat as he read the message and he knew that this was really going to happen. 

Whitney watched the excitement curse through him as he read the message and felt joy at how hopeful and eager he was. After finding out what time they needed to be going out she headed back to her house to get ready. Her best friend needed her there for moral support and she was damm well going to be there. But just because she wasn’t going out on the pull it didn’t mean she couldn’t dress for the occasion so she picked out her best outfit too, although her trousers didn’t have quite the same effect on her behind as Callum’s did on his.

When she was ready she rang Callum to let him know and she headed back over to the Vic. They decided it was a good idea to have a drink or two before they left, trying to let the nerves settle a little bit and using the alcohol to give Callum a bit of extra courage. He was already drinking a pint when she walked him and she spotted him sitting at a table in the corner nervously chewing on a fingernail. She noticed he already got her favourite drink ready for her so she went and sat down, saying thanks for the drink as she plonked herself down next to him.

“Cheers” she said as she picked up he’d drink and took a sip. Callum tilted his drink towards her and took a swig as well before he put it back down on the table. 

“I’m so nervous”

“You’ll be fine, remember you hit it off before there’s no reason to think this will be any different”

“Yeah I suppose so”

“Callum” Whitney put her hand on Callum’s forearm and looked him in the eye, “you’ve got this”

Callum sighed loudly and said “yeah”. Just then Linda walked over to where they were sitting, bringing over a couple of shots and placed them on the table. They both looked up at her surprised, “on the house” she said as she smiled and wondered back towards the bar. They didn’t question it but instead clinked their glasses together and threw the drinks back in one gulp, coughing slightly afterwards with the burn on their throats. 

“Do you think they over ordered on the tequila?” 

“Don’t care Whit, I’m just glad for it”

Callum laughed and the beer and shot went to his head, he had never been much of a drinker, much more than this would usually make he feel sick but tonight he was pleased to have it to give him that bit more confidence he needed for meeting up with Ben. They had time for one more before they needed to leave and Callum decided on a soft drink, knowing his own limits and not wanting to be drunk before he got to the bar. Whitney had more alcohol, she wasn’t the lightweight that he was and she was determined to have some fun tonight. 

As the time that Callum knew Ben would be arriving in the bar approached, he and Whitney got up to leave. “Have a good night” Linda shouted from behind the bar and Mick gave them a wave as went out the door. They walked arm in arm along the empty market, heading towards the Albert. Callum felt himself get a little more nervous the closer he got and suddenly the alcohol he drank had left his body and he felt sober as a judge. 

Callum stopped outside the bar and hesitated, Whitney stepped forwards and tugged at his arm slightly, encouraging him and kicking him into action to walk through the door. They got in and had a look around so Callum could try and spot if Jay and Ben were already there. He spotted them sitting in the same seats as they were sat in the first time he met them and his mind remembered what a perfect evening that had been, well until they’d disappeared at least. Ben had his back to the door and Jay was facing them. He locked eyes with Callum for a second and gave a tiny nod of acknowledgement. Callum pointed the pair out to Whitney and she looked over to where they were sitting. 

“Over there Whit” 

Whitney squinted at the two men and hoped that it wasn’t the ginger one Callum was talking about, he was cute but she couldn’t see why her best friend would be so hung up on him. But then the other man turned to his left and she could see his profile. Ok she could see Callum’s point, he wasn’t her type but even she could admit he was handsome, and the way she heard her friend’s breath hitch as he saw the side of Ben’s face told her all she needed to know and that Callum was right, there was no way he shouldn’t at least be trying to make this work. 

“Shall we go get a drink first before you go and talk to him?”

“Yeah that’s probably for the best”

“C’mon then”

They headed to the bar and each got a drink, Callum decided on something with a low alcohol content not wanting to get drunk and they went to sit at the table near where the other men were. Callum decided the best course of action for tonight was to not be pushy, wanting to make eye contact first and then wait for Ben to invite him over. Unfortunately it didn’t work out like that though. Callum sat directly opposite Ben and he kept trying to catch his eye. But every time Ben was about to look his way Whitney laughed and threw her head back, letting out a dirty laugh. It wasn’t intentional though as Whit had her back to Ben and had no idea when he was looking their way, but he was unable to make eye contact with her in the way.

In the end Callum asked her to move to a different chair leaving his line of sight clear to Ben. Eventually, after what seemed like forever Ben finally looked in his direction, and their eyes locked for a fraction of a second. Much like earlier that day Callum’s heart beat faster, but Ben looked away again so fast that he started to question if the other man had really even seen him. He waited a bit longer to see if Ben looked his way again but he didn’t. 

Callum felt a sense of disappointment creeping in. He’d hoped that once they made eye contact that there would be an immediate attraction and Ben would be falling over himself to invite him over. Whitney noticed the change in mood of her friend and leaned in to ask him what was wrong. She just shook her head at him and told him to man up and go to ask him if he wanted a drink. Callum knew she was right, if it was any other guy he’d go and ask, with or without a signal to go over. He stood up and took the few steps over to where the men were sitting . Ben stopped talking to Jay and looked up to where Callum was standing over him, taking his time to run his eyes over Callum’s body on the way up to his face. 

“Can I buy you a drink?”

Callum tried to sound confident and sure of himself even though he felt anything but. Ben was sat looking directly at him and he could feel his top lip starting to sweat. The seated man was about to speak but then his phone went off and he reached into his pocket to retrieve it. “Shit” he muttered under his breath as he read a text message. He looked to Jay and nodded towards the door, indicating that he wanted to go and Callum felt his heart sink, he’d finally worked up the courage to approach the other man and he was going to run out on him. Ben went to stand up but Jay put his arm out to try and stop him. 

“Bruv, we’ve only had one pint, what’s the rush?”

“My dad”

At that Jay nodded his understanding and he got up to leave too. Callum was still stood next to the table waiting for a reply and feeling like a complete spare part. Ben went to walk past him, their arms brushed together and Ben stopped a couple of steps away before turning around to look back at him. “Maybe next time huh” he said as he winked then turned back around to carry on walking out of the bar. Callum watched them both go and he saw Jay look back to shrug at him before they disappeared out of the door. 

Callum went and sat back down next to Whitney and picked his bottle back up. “That went well then” she said to him as he took a large swig of his drink and she went to buy them some shots. The night was still young and they could still have fun without Ben. Even if it did involve her friend drowning his sorrows. 


	8. Chapter 8

Callum had a sore head in the morning. He and Whitney had spent the rest of the night drinking and dancing at the Albert after Ben and Jay left. Whitney made it her mission to cheer up her friend and in the end they had a great night. Callum even ended up getting off with a guy on the dance floor until the guys hands moved down to his arse and then he pulled away and staggered off to find Whitney. She was snogging someone herself having found one of the only straight men in there that night. 

Callum decided to leave her to it, Whitney needed to let off steam as well so he headed to the bar to grab another drink while she continued to make out with the guy in the corner. Callum made sure to keep an eye on her and was within sight if she needed to get out of the situation or needed to find him. He text her quickly to say where he was and to come find him if she got bored of what she was doing. He saw her pull away from the guy to reach into her bag to get her phone, then she read the message, turned to where Callum was to check he was there and replaced her phone before getting back to the man she was with. 

Callum smiled to himself, glad that Whitney was having a good time and turned to the barman and ordered a drink. Just as it was placed down on the bar and he paid for it the guy he’d been making out with sidled up next to him and started slipping his hand down the back of Callum’s jeans, his finger tips brushing the top of crack of his arse. Callum closed his eyes and enjoyed the contact, he could so easily let this happen, take this guy home and let him fuck him, he started to feel a stirring in his groin as the guy’s hand got lower but then in his mind he got a flash of blue eyes and and his own eyes shot open. He turned his head to look at the man, he was gorgeous and his green eyes were full of lust. 

Callum reached his hand around and pulled the other man’s hand away, it came out of Callum’s jeans and the guy had a wounded look on his face, pouting slightly. He fancied Callum a lot and thought he was onto a sure thing so to be shot down was a little disappointing. “Sorry” Callum apologised and the guy shrugged and walked back onto the dance floor. Callum watched as he went up to another bloke and he before he knew it, he had his tongue down his throat. He laughed to himself over how flakey he was but was pleased he was so easily replaced and the guy could still have some fun. 

Eventually Whitney pulled herself away from the guy she was with and joined Callum at the bar, both of them had fun but neither wanted to go home with anyone so they headed out. They were both drunk so decided to go back to the Vic and collapsed into Callum’s bed together, pretty much falling asleep as soon as their heads hit the pillows. They both felt the after affects of the alcohol when they woke up, needing to pop some paracetamol before even attempting to roll out of bed. 

When they made it out they stumbled into the kitchen where Mick was cooking breakfast, Callum in front and Whitney blearily walking behind him, inwardly cringing she was still fully dressed in her outfit from the night before with a face full of slightly smudged makeup. At least everybody knew this wasn’t a walk of shame, just mates crashing out together. Mick greeted them as they came in and told them to both sit down while he finished crisping up the bacon. When he finished he plonked a plate down in front of them and told them to eat up. “Good night was it guys?” He asked a little surprised that Callum didn’t bring a guy home with him. 

“There was a lot of alcohol” Callum admitted as he shovelled some sausage into his mouth and then dunked a slice of bread in the runny yolk of his egg. “This is magic, thanks Mick” Callum said as he shoved the yolk soaked bread into his mouth, grateful that Mick knew him well enough to have a fry up ready and waiting for him. Mick left them in peace and wondered off to go set up the bar, they carried on eating their breakfast and both felt a little bit better with the grease settling in their stomachs, the urge to throw up subsiding slightly. 

“So… Ben then?” 

“Yeah”

“He’s cute”

“Yeah” Callum smiled.

“Are you going to try again?”

“He did say maybe next time”

Callum remembered how he felt when he saw Ben again, how excited and nervous he was. He felt disappointed when Ben had to go but when he turned around to say ‘next time’ it ignited hope in him. He must have fancied him to put a possible next time out there. It was just a shame that he wouldn’t bloody remember it. Each time Callum wanted to see him he had to build up the confidence to make the first move. He knew that he could be putting himself out there to be shot down time and time again. He hoped the next time involved more than a couple of words and a fleeting glance. 

Not long after they finished their breakfast Whitney gave him a hug and headed off home, leaving Callum to try and make himself presentable for his lunchtime shift. Lucky Whit had the day off and Callum wished he did too, kinda wishing that he could drag his arse back to bed. Instead he hopped in the shower and tried to wash away the stench of alcohol that was still lingering on him, enjoying the feeling of the hot water blasting down onto his head and body. When he was satisfied he was feeling human again he got out, threw a towel around his waist and headed back to his room. 

He chucked his body down onto the bed and closed his eyes, putting his arm across his eyes to try and blank out some of the day light coming into his room. Next thing he knew Linda was banging on his door, “Halfway, get your arse downstairs now your shift started 20 minutes ago”. Callum jolted out of his sleep and sprung up out of bed, the towel around his waist had worked itself loose and when he stood up it was left behind, he hid behind the door naked and opened it a crack to see Linda looking decidedly unhappy with her hands on her hips. He apologised and promised he would be down in ten minutes and she stomped off satisfied he was on his way down. 

He chucked on some clothes and rushed to the bathroom to brush his teeth, wishing he’d done it before he fell asleep and caught sight of himself in the mirror. He’d fallen asleep with wet hair and now it was sticking up all over the place. He groaned at the image before him and tried to wet the unruly mop to stick it back down. It wasn’t listening and sprung back up so he admitted defeat and left it as if was, giving it a quick comb and then heading downstairs, not particularly caring if he looked a state. 

He was an hour into his shift when the door opened and in walked a familiar face. Ben was walking towards the bar and Callum froze to the spot, completely dumbfounded that Ben was in the pub, he’d never seen him in there before. Jay was behind him and was holding his phone up at Callum, gesturing for him to look at it. He hadn’t even thought about looking at his phone since the night before, it was probably on his bedside table and for a minute he thought about racing upstairs to grab it but he didn’t want to run out on the man. Luckily Ben went to order a drink off of Linda so Callum took the chance to escape and get it. 

When he picked it up he noticed he had a few messages from Jay, a couple from last night and then one from that morning. The ones from the night before were apologies for them leaving so early, no real explanation just that there was a family matter that needed sorting. Then there was another asking him why he wasn’t replying, and one from the morning warning him that Ben was going to be in the Vic for lunch so make sure he was ready. Callum groaned to himself, annoyed he’d mucked up another chance at making a good first impression. He raced back downstairs just as Ben and Jay were sitting down with their drinks. Linda told him they ordered food so sent him to the kitchen to get it sorted. 

Callum was grateful that he could go hide out the back, he wasn’t sure he was best placed to make Ben fall in love with him today. When he finished dishing up the pie and chips they both ordered he carried the plates out to the waiting men, placing them down on the table and telling them to enjoy their food. Ben looked up at him and smiled his thanks, his eyes lingering on the top of his head for longer than you’d expect and he chuckled to himself. It was then Callum remembered the state of his hair and blushed, feeling his face heating up to a bright pink. He shoulders slumped and he turned around to trudge back to the kitchen feeling totally defeated. He didn’t notice Ben watching his arse as he walked away, Jay did though. 

When Callum thought he couldn’t hide out in the kitchen anymore since there were no more food orders, he headed back out to stand behind the bar, trying his hardest to not let his eyes drift over to the table that Ben was sitting at. He was only stood there for a matter of minutes before Ben was coming up to order more drinks, this time he opted to go to Callum rather than Linda and stood before him with a cocky sort of half smile. 

“Two pints thanks mate”

“Yeah of course”

“Are you new? I’ve not seen you before”

“Yep, not been here long, I know the Carters from way back” 

“Can I get the name of your barber?” 

“I know I know, I fell asleep with wet hair” Callum blushed again

“It’s cute” 

Callum looked up from the pint he was pulling to look Ben in the eye, he was smiling back at him amused, his blue eyes sparking with mischief and openness. Callum blushed even more if it was possible. 

“I’m Ben” 

“Callum” 

“Can I get your number Callum?” 

The pint overfilled and spilled over the drip tray and onto Callum’s foot while he was distracted by Ben’s question. He quickly turned the tap off and placed the pint on the bar alongside the one he pulled first. He told Ben the cost of the drinks and he handed over a £10 note, he was watching Callum the whole time and he was finding it hard to concentrate on counting out the correct change. When Callum eventually passed him his change he grabbed a pen and piece of paper and scribbled his number down on it before handing it over to the other man. He smiled at him again and Callum felt the damn butterflies again. Ben put the paper in his shirt pocket, picked up the pints and headed back to the table that Jay was sitting at. 

Jay was watching the whole exchange and he was pleased to see that apparently Ben found Callum being a big dope rather cute. He could have placed money on the fact he wouldn’t give him a second look with him looking like he just rolled out of bed. When Ben got up to go to the bathroom 15 minutes later Jay gave Callum a quick thumbs up and the other man beamed a giant smile towards him. Jay could see why Ben would find him cute, he was a bit like a giant puppy. 

After Ben and Jay finished their drinks they got up to leave, Callum watched as they walked towards the door and Ben turned round to look at him before they stepped out, giving him a little head nod and then disappeared out onto the square. Callum felt a massive sense of relief and grabbed his phone to ring Whitney to tell her the good news. 


	9. Chapter 9

Whitney hadn’t been too enthusiastic when Callum called her to tell her about Ben, but then she was still hanging and cared very little about anything but laying on the sofa and watching crap TV. She did manage to tell him she was pleased for him though and she wanted to hear all about it the next time she saw him. She was excited for him even if she didn’t have the energy to show it right now.

Callum hung up to her and then his phone was ringing in his hand. The screen flashed Kathy’s name and he answered it immediately with a cheery hello. She was excited because Jay had already text her and Lola to let them know about them know about what happened in the pub at lunchtime. It was the first time that Ben had actively asked a guy for his phone number in a long time and all of Ben’s loved ones felt justified in their encouragement of Callum in pursing him. 

Callum knew not to get his hopes up. Just because Ben asked for his number it didn’t mean much. There was no guarantee he was going to call him and by the time he woke up in the morning he wouldn’t even remember whose number it was anyway. But it was a start. The fact that Ben saw him in the harsh light of day, looking like an idiot with bad hair and hung over as hell and still wanted his details. It gave him hope that given enough opportunities he would end up getting to know the other man better. 

As the day wore on Callum continued to work and by the time his shift came to the end he was ready to go crash out in bed. He waved to the customers he’d been chatting to and headed upstairs, going straight to his room and allowing himself to fall face first onto the bed, bouncing a few times until his body settled onto the messy blue duvet cover that he hadn’t had a chance to make earlier. He could feel himself drifting off when his phone pinged with a message. He nearly didn’t bother to look at it, the idea of sleep was too appealing, but in the end he reached into his back pocket to grab the phone out of his jeans. 

When he looked it was from an unknown number and his heart skipped a beat. He tapped on it to open it and held his breath without realising he was doing it as he read the text.

07630971629: Hey Mary, do you want to meet for a drink tonight?

Callum let his breath out and laughed, instantly getting the reference to Mary and enjoying Ben’s sense of humour. That was one of his favourite films and obviously Ben was a fan too or he wouldn’t be using it to make fun of Callum’s unfortunate hairstyle for the day. He clicked on the number and saved it to his phone under Ben. He smiled at the newest contact and then went back to the message and pressed on the reply button. 

Callum: I’d love to. Name a time and place and I’m there

Ben: do you know the Prince Albert?

Callum wanted to say ‘yeah I do, I’m there most nights and fell for you there’ but clearly wasn’t going to write that. 

Callum: the one on Turpin Road? Yeah

Ben: that’s the one. Meet you there in an hour?

Callum: see you then

Ben: :-) 

Callum fired off a quick text to Kathy, Jay and Lola to update them on the latest turn of events and let them know he was meeting Ben for a drink. They all text back almost instantly, surprised and excited that Ben had taken the step to ask him out so fast. They wished him luck and reminded him again to take care of the man they all loved. Callum reassured them he was going to try his very best to not do anything to hurt him. He also sent a message to Whitney to let her know, but he didn’t get a reply so he imagined she’d already fallen asleep after spending a hard day hung over. 

He rushed to jump in the shower again, determined to wash and tame his hair this time. When he finished he put on the best clothes he had that weren’t in the wash and asked Linda if he could borrow her hair dryer, he was running out of time and he needed to sort his hair out. He asked what he was up to and was he out to find a friend for the night, and without thinking he said he had a date. Her eyes lit up at that, excited that Callum was having an actual date rather than just bringing a one night stand home. She grabbed the hairdryer and handed it straight over and told him to have a good time while smiling brightly at him. 

When Callum finished sorting his hair he looked at himself in the mirror and tried to calm down, taking a couple of deep breaths and mentally preparing himself to go meet Ben, totally alone and on a date. He was pleased with how his hair turned out even if it was a little fluffy from the blow dry, but the gel managed to get it to stick in place. He nodded to himself and grabbed his phone and keys, checking the time and knowing he only had ten minutes to get to the Albert. 

He walked down the stairs and through the pub, Mick and Linda both told him to have a good time and he was through the door and out onto the deserted market on his way to meet Ben. He strode with purpose trying his hardest to not overthink things. Telling himself he was just like any other guy Callum had spoken to, just talk to him normally and don’t act weird. Before he knew it he was standing outside the bar looking at the door, attempting to get his legs to move forwards and walk through the threshold. 

“Alright Mary” 

Callum shot his head to the side and was met with blue eyes and a cheeky grin as Ben stood smiling at him. 

“Shall we go in then?” Ben gestured to the door and started to walk towards it. Callum’s limbs finally decided to work and he followed after. Ben got to the door, opened it and held it for Callum to walk through first. “Such a gent” Callum commented as he walked past, “ma’am” Ben mock bowed and doffed his non-existent hat. They both laughed and walked towards the bar to get a drink, Callum offered to get the first round but Ben waved him off, asking him what he fancied… “you” Callum said without thinking and Ben cracked up laughing, “smooth” he commented and slapped the taller man on the back while he blushed. 

Callum remembered everything that Ben had told him the first night they met but was trying to be careful about dropping into conversation all the things he already knew about him, realising that that would make him seem like some sort of stalker. They were getting on as well as that night though, huddled together in the corner of the bar drinking their drinks and chatting about their jobs and families. Callum didn’t talk about his real family, instead opting to refer to the Carters as his chosen family and told Ben about how they’d given him a job and a home. Ben told Callum again about Lexi, and he spoke about her with as much love and enthusiasm as he did before making Callum’s heart leap a little bit. 

They were on their third drink and they were edging ever closer to each other. They were close enough to smell the beer on each other’s breath and Ben looked into Callum’s eyes with the most amazing combination of coyness and confidence in his blue eyes and he bit his bottom lip before swiping his tongue over it, Callum’s eyes were drawn to it, watching the pink tongue dampen down the pillowy flesh. Ben’s lips were slightly open and Callum noticed that both their breathing seemed to quicken. Ben’s eyes shot to Callum’s lips and then back to his eyes and then he was reaching up his hand and brushing Callum’s cheek, leaning in and pressing a kiss to the lips in front of him. 

Callum felt the kiss go straight to his groin. The sensation of Ben’s lips on his was everything he imagined it would be. He wanted to be cool, to play it like he wasn’t desperate for this but he couldn’t help himself. With Ben’s lips against his and his tongue licking at his mouth he couldn’t hold back. Both his hands reached up to Ben’s face, and he held on for dear life as his tongue invaded the other man’s mouth, moaning into the kiss as Ben’s other hand reached and grabbed hold of the front of Callum’s shirt, trying to pull him closer. 

It was the most mind blowing moment of his life, sitting there, kissing Ben and having him kiss him back. This was sexier than anything that had come before and he didn’t think he had ever been as turned on as he was in that moment.

The hand that Ben had on Callum’s face moved down and landed on Callum’s thigh and his whole body jumped at the sudden contact. His trousers were getting uncomfortable and the zip was beginning to strain against the pressure from his cock growing and getting harder. It wasn’t helped by the fact that Ben’s hand then started to move up his leg and landed on the bulge in Callum’s jeans. Callum, pulled away and whispered ‘fuck’ quickly before diving back in to kiss him again, he swore he could feel Ben laughing into the kiss. 

It felt like time stood still, in their own world while the rest of the bar continued to move around them. Just knowing and seeing each other, touching and tasting the other man, this was all either of them cared about. When they finally parted Ben looked at Callum with dark lust filled eyes before he pressed his forehead up against his and whispered “do you have somewhere we can go”. If that didn’t make Callum go rock hard then nothing would and now it was getting painful. 

He was about to say yes and drag the other man back to the Vic but then the lights came on in the bar to indicate it was kicking out time and the moment was ruined. He pulled away from Ben and looked at his watch, realising that it was too late. If Ben was to go home with him now they’d have sex fall asleep and then Ben would wake up in the morning and not remember any of it. He didn’t want to be the reason that he freaked out, waking up with a strange guy in a strange place. As much as he wanted to just say yes he had to shake his head. 

“I can’t” he whispered. 

Ben took a deep breath and put his head down before he looked back up at Callum and smiled. 

“I want to, god do I want to” he pointed down to his crotch, “but I can’t tonight” 

Ben looked at what he did to the other man and had a smug smile break out on his face, Callum thought he looked beautiful. Flush with lust, a light layer of sweat on his face and that cheeky grin. He wanted to grab his face and kiss him for the rest of his life but he resisted. 

“Can we do this again Ben?”

Ben stood up and adjusted his own trousers, looking down at the cute guy with the unruly hair he could think of nothing he wanted to do more than see him again. He bent over and put his fingers under Callum’s chin, raising his face and mouth up towards him and placed a gentle kiss on his mouth before pulling back and standing up. 

“I’ll call you tomorrow” he promised as he winked and then turned and walked out the bar. 

“No you won’t” Callum said sadly to himself as he watched Ben walk away. 


	10. Chapter 10

Of course Callum didn’t get a phone call the next day, nor the day after that. And when he walked past Ben on the square three days later the other man didn’t even look at him. It was expected but it was still hard for him to take, knowing he was a stranger to the guy he was falling hard for. 

The night of their date had been so perfect and it really couldn’t have gone better except for when he had to turn the other man down. He was so turned on by that point and he still had the scent of Ben in his nose and the taste of him in his mouth. When he got home he couldn’t help but touch himself, remembering the feeling of Ben’s hand on him and the pressure of his lips on his. He came hard with the memory of Ben’s mouth and talented tongue kissing him, wishing that it was the other man’s hand on his now spent cock. He fell asleep before cleaning himself up and dreamt that he was curled up in bed with Ben, wrapped around another body. 

In the morning he woke to a crust on his stomach and he headed straight to the shower to wash it off. Letting the warm water cascade down his body he closed his eyes and remembered the night before and the way Ben looked at him before he kissed him. He couldn’t help his body from responding again and before he knew it he was pumping on his hard member again, hand on the wall to support himself, head down and grunting softly with each stoke. He came with a little cry, shooting his seed all over the wall. He waited for his breath to return before he opened his eyes and went about cleaning not only himself but the shower too. 

While he was in the bathroom he had a missed call from Kathy so he called her back straight away. She was wondering how the date was and asked him if he wanted to meet her and Lola for breakfast at the cafe. He agreed and said he would be over in 10 minutes. He quickly got ready to go and popped his head into the kitchen on his way past to say morning to the Carters. 

“Halfway, do you want some breakfast” 

“No thanks Mick, I’m going over the cafe”

“How was the date?” Linda asked tentatively, it was the first date he’d had since he came out and she really hoped it all went well. The bright smile and nod she got back from Callum told her everything she needed to know and she told him how pleased she was that it went good. He waved bye as he carried on past the room and headed down the stairs. Mick and Linda smiled at each other and hoped they would hear all the details later, they were both fond of the lad and wanted him to be happy. 

Callum walked over to the cafe, pushed open the door and walked through. Kathy was standing behind the counter, she smiled when she spotted him and pointed him over to the table in the corner where Lola was sitting as she asked him what he wanted to eat. 

“Bacon roll and a coffee please Kathy” he said as he walked over to sit down with Lola. She smiled at him and stood as he got closer, stepping out from behind the table to give him a quick hug. He wasn’t expecting it and was surprised with the show of affection but when she pulled back she had a really happy look on her face. She stepped back to where she stood up from and sat back down, gesturing for him to sit opposite. 

Lola continued to just look at him and smile and he was beginning to feel a little uncomfortable under her gaze. Soon enough Kathy brought over a roll and drink for Callum and placed them down in front of him, he thanked her as Lola stood up to move over to the next chair to let Kathy sit down in her chair. Callum picked up the bacon roll and took a bite, noting there was no sauce but carried on regardless. 

They were both looking at him expectantly and smiling, desperate to hear what Callum had to say. He was too busy eating his breakfast to take much notice and they patiently waited for him to finish eating before they started to pump him for information. They were sitting up straight in their chairs and leaning in.

“How did it go”

“What happened?” 

They both started talking at the same time and Callum held his hands up to stop them from talking over each other before he reached for his coffee cup. He laughed at their eagerness and they both slumped back down slightly. 

“It was great, really great. We had a good time and we got on really well. He said he’d call me today but you know…” he trailed off, they knew only too well. They had the same sympathetic looks on their faces and Lola reached out for the hand Callum had wrapped around his drink, placing it on top and patting it gently. Callum looked sad realising that the Ben he spent last night with was never going to call him and it hurt. They understood completely. 

“He was in the best mood this morning Callum, I haven’t see him so chirpy and full of life first thing in a long time”

“Yeah?” Callum looked up at Lola as she continued to talk

“He was so happy and when I asked what got into him he didn’t know, just that he felt really happy. You did that, you made him feel like that”

Callum felt a sting in his eye, knowing that Ben was feeling like that after their date gave him real hope. He didn’t remember what happened but he felt something within himself to know that something had made him happy. Callum hoped he could make progress on it and that the feelings he generated in the other man would continue to bleed through to the following day, building on the foundations from their evening together. 

Kathy and Lola looked like they were getting as emotional as Callum felt, they had lived with Ben since the accident and they saw how he was everyday. For them to notice such a change after a single date, it must mean something. Maybe there was hope there Ben could start to remember again. 

“So what happened?” Kathy asked. Callum told them some of what happened but definitely left out some of the more personal things. They sure as hell didn’t need to know about the raging hard on their son/father of their daughter gave him. But he told them what they talked about and how long they spent together at the bar, sharing details of their lives and families. Then he shared the important information. 

“We kissed”

“Awwwwwwwwwww” they said in unison

“It was…. So special, it was magic” he couldn’t find the right words as to how to explain it. He brought his hand up to his face and touched his lips at the memory of Ben. Lola and Kathy turned to look at each other with the soppiest looks on their faces, trying their hardest to hold back the tears. They were amazed by the change in Ben already, just one proper date with Callum, and his whole mood lifted. He was dancing around in the living room with Lexi and singing along to the radio. He hadn’t done that in so long and they missed that part of him, ever since the accident he woke up in the morning with the same neutral expression, seemingly never being in neither a good or bad mood. Callum brought out this change and they were so grateful to the man for changing Ben’s life, even if Ben doesn’t know it. 

After discussing the date and the girls telling Callum all about Ben’s good mood, Kathy picked up the empty plate and cup in front of the young man and took them both back over to the counter, leaving Callum and Lola sitting alone. She moved back into the vacant chair she was originally sitting in and checked to see that Kathy was staying over at the till before she leaned in and started to talk in a quiet voice so nobody could overhear them. 

“I heard Ben when he got in last night”

“And?”

“The walls at very thin at our place”

She winked at him and he took a minute to catch up before he blushed and looked down at the table, unable to look her in the eye. Thinking about Ben being at home and having the same reaction to him that he had and having to scratch the itch… it made him a bit embarrassed knowing Lola knew that about Ben and by Callum’s obvious discomfort he all but confirmed he did the same thing. Lola just laughed and told him to not stress about it, it’s a good thing. Callum was just thankful that Lola waited until Kathy was out of earshot before she thought to mention it. 

“You’re good for each other, you know that right” 

“I think so”

“I’ve never seen Ben act so smitten, not even before the accident. How he was this morning… it’s a miracle”

Callum couldn’t help the grin spread across his face, happy to know that he wasn’t fucking this whole thing up and hopeful for what the future may bring. Judging by the look on Lola’s face she was feeling the same and was excited on Ben’s behalf. It might take a little while before they got to go on another first date, but Callum was feeling positive about the fact it was going to happen, even if the next time he saw Ben he didn’t even acknowledge him. 


	11. Chapter 11

The next few weeks were hit and miss.

A couple of times Callum ran into Ben at the Albert or Vic and they ended up having a drink. Sometimes Ben blanked him entirely and once when Callum went to ask Ben if he wanted a drink he flat out told him no. It was difficult when that happened, being rejected when things had been going well but he tried to not take things personally. Ben was allowed an off day and he was allowed to turn him down. 

Callum still met up with Ben’s family to discuss things, if he had a date with Ben then they wanted to know the details and they in return told him how he was acting the morning after. They noticed that when they spent time together Ben was nearly always in a better mood, offering to make people breakfast or humming a tune to himself. Kathy loved those days, seeing her son happy was all she ever wanted and he did always seem happy whenever Callum was involved. 

One morning, after they had a quick drink the night before, Callum ran into him again… literally ran into him. They bumped into each other outside the Minute Mart and they both ended up dropping what they were carrying, food and magazines ended up all over the the ground. Ben swore and cursed at the interruption to his day, bending down to pick up what he lost and when he stood up again he came face to face with the most beautiful blue eyes he had ever seen. He was spellbound immediately. 

“Are you from around here?”

“I work at the Vic, I’m friends with the Carters”

“Ben”

“Callum”

“Are you busy?”

“Nothing I can’t get out of”

“Want a drink?”

“I’d love to”

“The Prince Albert, half an hour?”

“I’ll be there”

Ben licked his lips and looked the other man up and down appreciatively before he smiled and turned to walk on his way. Callum took a deep breath as he watched him walk away, his heart racing a little from the unexpected meeting and his eyes settling on Ben’s arse as he appreciated his body in return. That was the first time he’d met Ben so early in the day and the first time he’d been so forward with him. Callum felt a little thrill, the same thrill he used to feel when he was out hooking up with men at the bar, meeting someone, knowing what they both wanted and then just going for it. The hairs on the back off his neck were standing up from the excitement and he gathered the things he dropped that were still sitting on the floor.

He got back to the Vic and quickly checked himself out in the mirror, making sure his hair was in place and he wasn’t looking too bad, he figured he must be looking good enough if Ben wanted to meet him later. He brushed his teeth and sprayed some deodorant over his clothes to make sure he felt as fresh as he could be. It was still early, only 10.30 and he hadn’t had time to get covered in the stench of the day yet. He had to check with Linda that it was ok he skipped his shift, they weren’t usually that busy on a weekday and most of the time he ended up twiddling his thumbs with nothing to do. He thinks the Carters only pay him out of pity sometimes since there isn’t really enough work for him to do during the day, not wanting to let him down or leave him short of cash. He found Linda behind the bar, stocking the fridge with mixers. 

“Is it ok if I have the day off?”

“It’s a bit short notice Halfway”

“I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t important”

“I won’t be able to get any cover now”

“I’m meeting Ben”

Linda immediately stopped what she was doing and looked at him. He’d told the Carters about the other man, explaining the medical condition and what was wrong with him. They were worried about him at first, this had heartbreak written all over it but it was Callum’s decision and if this was what he wanted to do then they were going to stand by him. They did notice how much brighter Callum was when he spent time with Ben and they knew it was important to him. Linda realised she had to support him now so she said it was fine for him to have the day off. He went rushing off with a skip in his step and a big dopey grin his face. Linda smiled after him and hoped he knew he was getting himself into, she cared about the boy and he had a big heart. She decided to ring Whitney to see if she would come in to cover the evening shift that Halfway was inevitably going to skip out on.

Callum strode over to the cafe to pop his head in to talk to Kathy, she was there as she usually was and he quickly told her that he was off to meet Ben. She was surprised he was meeting him so early but told him to have a nice time anyway as he darted off back out of the cafe. She couldn’t believe the change in the way Ben acted and his attitude whenever he’d been with Callum, She had been worried about this whole situation to start with but the more time Ben spent with Callum the more he seemed to be like his old self. She was grateful for the young man that came into their lives and was trying to turn her son’s life around. 

He got to the Albert bang on time and when he entered the building Ben was already stood at the bar waiting for him. He turned around when he heard a noise and smiled at the man who just walked in, taking a minute to look up and down his body again like he had outside the shop, lingering on Callum’s crotch a little longer than necessary with a smug little smile pulling at his mouth. He asked him what he wanted to drink and they both ended up with a coffee and a pastry which they took over to the seats where they originally met. Ben might not know the significance of these chairs but Callum certainly did and it gave him a thrill when he sat down, remembering when they kissed. 

They drank their coffees and chatted for a while, pleasantries really, then Ben was moving and he sat right up close to the other man, putting his hand on his thigh. Callum felt a jolt go through his whole body and suddenly Ben was kissing him hard and desperate. Callum moaned into the other man’s mouth enjoying the sensation of Ben’s taste again, remembering how turned on he was the last time he was in this position. Ben pulled away and he looked sinful, his lips were swollen red and moist and his eyes were dark and hungry, Callum wanted to pull him back in and kiss him again, wanted to mount him there and then in the middle the empty bar with just a barmaid as a witness. But then Ben was talking to him and Callum tried desperately to focus on what he was saying, he was just catching snippets in amongst the rush of blood around his body. 

“Come with me, I have somewhere to go”

Callum nodded, agreeing immediately and desperate to get more of the man. He’d known him for over a month at this point and he’d wanted him from the moment he set eyes on him, he’d have dragged him back to the Vic the first night he met him if he’d had the opportunity and now here he was, the chance to finally get more than a kiss and was feeling giddy with the possibility. Ben grabbed his hand and led him towards the door, out onto the street and started weaving them through the bustling market. 

They hit the square and Callum glanced towards the cafe and hoped to god that Kathy wasn’t looking out the window at that moment. Ben continued to lead the way and soon they were heading towards the car lot. Ben used his keys to unlock the door, shoved it open and pulled Callum through behind him, slamming and locking the door shut behind them. 

He grabbed at the taller man and pulled his face down to his level, kissing him again deeply while letting his hands wander down his torso and starting to undo the belt of Callum’s jeans. Callum moaned and worried he wasn’t going to last, the sensation of finally being with Ben in this way was threatening to push him over the finish line before he even started. Ben started to back him towards a desk, shoving the paperwork to one side and the papers fluttered down to the ground and settled, spreading around the floor with the both of them walking over them. Neither of them cared and as Callum’s arse rested on top of the surface of the desk the other man was stood between his spread legs, lining their equally hard cocks up and started rubbing against him. He began to kiss at the exposed neck before him where Callum had his head thrown back, sucking and nibbling at the flesh. The older man groaned and then Ben dropped to his knees, continuing to work on the belt he hadn’t quite managed to undo so far. 

When they finished they were breathing hard and were both struggling to catch their breath. Callum was flat on his back on the desk and Ben was collapsed between his legs on top of him, plastered to the other man’s chest, a mix of sweat and cum sticking them together. The sex was mind blowing, just as Callum expected it to be. It felt as though fireworks went off every time Ben touched him, leaving a trail of flames where skin met skin and he never wanted the feeling to end. 

As he got his breath and senses back Ben began to stand up, untangling himself from the man beneath him and Callum felt the loss of the weight on top of him and sudden feeling of emptiness as Ben slipped from inside him. He watched as Ben disposed of the condom and began to collect the clothes that were strewn around the cabin, kindly picking up some of Callum’s items and passing them to him while he was still laying exposed on the desk. Ben took a minute to appreciate the other man laying in front of him before he went back to dressing, smiling to himself the whole time while Callum lay with his head to one side watching him. 

Eventually Callum moved and started to dress as well, keeping an eye on the other man who was now sitting on the couch and doing his shoes up. When they were both fully clothed again they shyly glanced at one another, neither one of them sure who was going to speak first, Ben was scratching at the back of his neck and Callum was chewing on a thumbnail. Ben broke the silence. 

“I don’t suppose you want to get some lunch do you?”

Callum’s heart swelled, he was half expecting for Ben to say thanks and see you later and he’d have accepted that, even if that wasn’t what he wanted. He was over the moon that he still wanted to do something else and he was excited at the prospect of spending more time together, up until then the longest they had spent in each other’s company was a few hours and Callum always hoped for more. 

“I’d love to”

They smiled at one another as Ben stood up and started to pick up the papers from the floor, attempting to put them back on the desk where they should be, even if some of them now had foot prints on. He explained that his brother would go mental if his stuff was in the wrong order, and even more so if he found out the reason why they were messed up as he winked at him. 

When everything was back in order they checked that one another was in a decent state to go back out in public and left the office, Ben locking it behind them. They went to Walford East for food and spent the time chatting and getting to know each other more. Ben told Callum about his family again, mentioning that his brother ran the restaurant they were in and Callum noticed Ian standing in the bar area keeping an eye on them from a safe distance. In return he opened up about his family, not the Carters but his brother and father, having never spoken about them to anyone else, not even Whitney, since he moved to Walford months ago. 

The conversation flowed easily and as he watched Ben chomping into a greasy burger Callum realised he was falling in love with the other man and it scared him. It was the first time he has ever felt like this and he was worried that the feeling could never be mutual, that Ben could never fall in love with him because how can you fall in love with someone in a day. Callum had gradually been falling in love with him since that first night, Ben would only ever have a few hours. He tried to not dwell on it, instead enjoying the company he was in and appreciating the sight of the man sitting opposite him. 

After lunch Callum really didn’t want to say goodbye so he asked if Ben wanted to go see a film with him and he was surprised and thankful that he agreed to, obviously not wanting to say bye yet either. They sat together in the dark cinema with Ben’s fingers lightly tracing a pattern into the skin on Callum’s hand, giving the older man goosebumps over his entire body with the gentle touch. Afterwards they went to get dinner, had a few drinks and ended up back at the Albert. They danced together and kissed on the dance floor, hands roaming over bodies and getting lost in each other, the rest of the room faded away and it felt like they were alone. When the music track changed and the sound system started to play ‘build me up buttercup’ Ben drew back and looked at Callum curiously, looking like he wanted to ask something but then the look was gone as quickly as it appeared. Instead Callum leaned down and kissed him again, cupping his face as Ben moaned into his mouth and snaked a hand up and around his neck. They danced some more as the night moved on and Callum was highly aware the end of the day was fast approaching.

It hit midnight and Ben said he had to go. 

“I wish you could come home with me”

“Me too”

“Are you working at the Vic tomorrow?”

“Yeah, at lunchtime”

“Cool, I’ll come see you then”

Ben reached his mouth up to kiss Callum, the other man responded by placing his hands on either side of his head and kissing him back, savouring the feeling and knowing he was about to lose it again. Ben pulled back and smiled before he turned to walk away saying he’d see him tomorrow. Callum stood heartbroken, watching Ben walk away from him and each step felt like someone was stamping on his soul. They had the most magical day together and he should be happy but he knew that he was going to be the only one to remember it. He tried not to cry while standing in the middle of a busy dance floor as he felt for the first time that maybe he couldn’t do this again.


	12. Chapter 12

It took Callum days to recover from their last date. Mick and Linda were worried about him because he barely left his room, only emerging for the toilet or to grab some junk food. They tried to talk to him but it was like talking to a brick wall, Callum wouldn’t mention Ben and he avoided all questions to do with him. He also refused to answer his phone when Kathy, Lola or Jay called to talk to him, he gave them complete radio silence, feeling totally overwhelmed with the grief of losing what he had or could have with Ben and not being able to see a way past it. In the end Mick called Whitney round, if anyone could get through to him it was his best friend. 

She was shocked when she walked in and saw the state of him. His hair was a mess and his eyes looked hollow, he had dirty plates and cups dotted around the room and the place was taking on a very unpleasant smell. She needed to do something to try and get him out of this pit. He was laying in bed buried under his duvet, cocooning himself away from the rest of the world and not wanting to make eye contact with her when she tried to pull the cover back to talk to him. 

“C’mon Callum, it’s not doing you any good wallowing around here, you need to get out and get some fresh air”

He didn’t answer so she sat on the edge of the bed, it dipped slightly as she settled herself next to him and she reached her hand to his face to brush the hair back off his forehead. He closed his eyes at the touch and she noticed he’d been crying, the remnants of the tears could still be seen on his cheeks and there was the telltale red tinge around his eyes. She felt so bad for him, he’d been so full of hope and dreams over Ben but she always had a worry it was going to end in heartbreak. She wished she wasn’t right, especially looking at the state her friend was now in. 

“What happened?”

Callum opened his eyes and looked at her, “I love him”

Whitney wasn’t expecting that and she looked at him curiously, her hand stilling on his hair. “Isn’t that a good thing?” She asked failing to see why he was so upset about the fact. “Surely that’s a good thing?”.

“He’ll never love me back, it just hit me and I don’t know how I can live with that”

“Oh Callum” she said as she realised why he was so upset. Being in love with somebody who could never love you back would be torture. She started to stroke his hair again, a comforting gesture to let him know she was there and for him to tell her anything he needed to 

“We had the most perfect day, we slept together…” he started upbeat and smiling, Whitney tried to not squeal at the information, feeling the excitement on his behalf, but then he looked so sad. “And afterwards he still wanted to hang out with me, we had lunch, went and saw a film, had dinner and then spent the night dancing together at the Albert. It was like a dream come true, I couldn’t have wished for a better day and I realised I was in love with him. But when he went home, I knew. I knew he could never love me back. If he saw me in the street today he’d walk straight past me, I’m a stranger to him and it hurts so fucking much Whit”

Callum started to cry again and Whitney laid alongside him and put an arm around his shaking body, trying to comfort him the best she could. She knew there was nothing she could say to make this better because she knew it was true, and it was what she had been so scared about. Callum was always going to end up hurting because his heart was so open, ready to love and now she feared it would become closed off and hard. She just stayed there with him so he wasn’t alone and eventually he dropped off to sleep.

A couple of days later Callum eventually started to pull himself together. He was finally showered and he’d taken all the dirty crockery out of room, going so far as to washing it all up and giving his hovel a bit of a tidy up. The Carters were pleased that he was seemingly getting back to his old self and decided to wait for him to come and talk to them if he wanted to. He joined them for breakfast that day and when he said thanks as Linda passed him a bacon sandwich the smile he gave her didn’t quite reach his eyes. They sat in relative silence, just a bit of polite chatter but when Linda got up to go and start to set up the bar Mick couldn’t not ask any longer. 

“Boy, I know you’re hurting but you’ve got to talk to us”, Callum sat and considered things for a minute and Mick thought he wasn’t going speak but then he opened his mouth.

“I… it hit me, how stupid I was. Thinking I could see him, spend time with him and not fall in love with him. It will always be unrequited. I’ve done this to myself Mick, I pursued him and now I don’t know what to do. I can’t not see him anymore but the thought of him looking straight through me seems so much worse.”

Mick didn’t know what to say, he wished he knew the right advice to give but it was such a tough situation to be in. With nothing helpful to say all he could do was shrug his shoulders and reach out to press a hand to his shoulder, “Only you can decide what to do” he said as he stood up to leave the kitchen and give Callum some peace. He just stared at a space on the wall contemplating things and nothing seemed to make sense in his own head anymore. He really didn’t know what to do. 

Later that day Callum was working behind the bar when Kathy walked in. He didn’t notice her at first, he wasn’t particularly paying attention to anyone coming or going through the door. Each time someone came up to order a drink Linda usually had to serve them because he didn’t move from where he was standing, leaning on the bar staring into space and looking generally unapproachable. 

Kathy clocked him straight away and stomped over to him, ready to let rip about why he was ignoring her calls but she was so taken aback by his appearance that she stopped herself from having a go. He looked exhausted, like he hadn’t slept for a month. His eyes had dark rings around them and there was a red tinge to them like he was on the edge of tears, the dam ready to crack open if someone said the wrong thing. Her anger softened and all she wanted to do was to walk around the bar to give him a huge hug. 

When he noticed her he stood up straight, trying to decide if he wanted to make a run for it and go hide out back, not wanting to have this conversation, but he knew it was too late for that. This was happening and he was going to have confront the truth, admitting that he was wrong and he should never have started this. He needed to apologise to Kathy for giving her false hope and convincing her this whole idiotic plan was a good idea. He gestured to her to sit down at a table and he told Linda he needed a few minutes, she waved him off since he hadn’t actually done any work anyway, and he went to sit with Ben’s mum. 

“You were right Kathy”

“I was?”

“It was a bad idea, you know him better, you knew this wouldn’t work and it didn’t”

“I was more worried about you in all this Callum. You were always setting yourself to get hurt and I’m so sorry you have been”

Callum felt on the verge of tears, even thinking about Ben was feeling too overwhelming. 

“I didn’t think it through Kathy, I thought I could just run into him, have fun, get to know him and then do it all again the next day. But now I actually know him and have feelings it’s too hard to say goodbye at the end of the day, I can’t not have him know who I am anymore. The thought of him walking past me on the street and not even giving me a second look, having to introduce myself again, it’s too much to stand”

She looked at him sympathetically and got up to go sit next to him, putting her arm around him and pulling him towards her to hug. He let himself be held and found the warmth of her care reassuring, the motherly affection he has never had in his life. She told him that he didn’t need to do this anymore, nobody thought any less of him and they all loved him for trying, for giving Ben joy on the days they were together. She reassured him there were no hard feelings and she understood completely why he couldn’t see Ben anymore, she wouldn’t be able to cope with him not recognising her either.

The conversation was left with the understanding that that was it, Callum wasn’t going to try to approach Ben again and Kathy and the others would try their best to steer him away from going where Callum was. She stood up to leave and gave Callum a kiss on his forehead and told him to not be too hard on himself, he was a good man. She left and Callum still felt like utter shit, even with her kindness and urging to not be hard on himself.

Kathy returned to her house where the others were waiting for her. Ben was out with Lexi and they were taking the opportunity to discuss everything, when she walked back in they looked at her expectantly, hoping she was coming with good news. They were all worried that they couldn’t get hold of Callum and were desperate for information about what happened to cause the silence because as far as they were aware everything was going great.

The morning after Ben and Callum’s day together Ben had been like a different man. Usually when he was with the other man he was happier, but this was something else. They didn’t think they had ever seen him so full of life, he didn’t know why he was in a good mood he just was. He danced around the kitchen cooking everybody breakfast singing ‘build me up buttercup’ over and over but when they asked him why he was singing it he had no clue, “Ear worm I guess” he told them. His good mood lasted a few days but then he seemed to go back to how he was normally and they wished he could be that happy Ben again.

Jay and Lola looked at Kathy when she came in but she had a sad look on her face and she shook her head at them. They both slumped down in their seats and were feeling a mixture of sad and angry, disappointed by the turn of events because they’d had a good feeling about Callum.

“It was too much, it was hurting him too much. We can’t be angry at him, he tried.” 

“But Ben, he was changing, he was getting happier”

“He can’t do it anymore Lola, starting every day over and over with Ben not knowing him”

“I knew this would happen” Jay bit out, angry that his brother was being cast aside. He stood up to storm out the room and head over to the Vic to have it out with Callum but Kathy caught him by the arm and stopped him, “Jay no, you have to leave it. He’s destroyed already, there’s nothing you can say or do that is going to make him feel any worse than he already does.” The fight left Jay and he sat back down next to Lola who put her arm around him. 

“He was changing Kathy, it was almost as if he was beginning to remember things again”

“Maybe, but we can’t force Callum to keep seeing him. You should have seen him Jay, he was a mess”

“At least we know Ben won’t be in the same state, small mercies and all that” Jay was thankful that Ben probably wouldn’t even remember Callum and wouldn’t feel the same loss that the other man clearly was. 

“So what do we do now?” Lola asked

“We go back to how it was before, look out for him, make sure he’s ok and hope his memory starts to come back. There is still hope, and that’s all we can do… wait and see”

They all nodded to each other, feeling sad that things with Callum hadn’t worked out for him and worried about what the future held for Ben, destined to stay trapped in the past forever with no hope of ever falling in love and making a future for himself. 


	13. Chapter 13

Life started to get back to normal for Callum, it wasn’t easy making the decision he did and he missed Ben terribly, but ultimately he knew he had done the right thing for them both. There was no way he could allow himself to feel like he did after that day he spent with the other man again. To finally sleep with him, spend the whole day together and then have to say goodbye to him tore his heart out. To realise you loved somebody and to lose them in the same day was impossible to live with. He hoped that by not seeing the younger man again he could protect his heart from anymore pain, even if he missed him with with very fibre of his being.

He even went on a couple of nights out with Whitney, encouraged by Linda. She was all for him settling down with someone but she knew after recent events that he needed to get back out there and have some fun. He wasn’t in any state to be thinking about a long term future with anybody at the moment so a couple of one night stands seemed like the best course of action. He needed something to focus on rather than Ben and she hoped going out with Whitney would provide the distraction he needed. He’d had fun pre-Ben and he can have fun post-Ben too. 

He’d tried to hook up when he went out those couple of times but he just wasn’t feeling it. The men were either too tall, too short, had the wrong colour eyes or just didn’t look right. Whitney looked at him sadly each time he turned somebody down, knowing that he was waiting for a certain Mitchell man to come sweep him off his feet and she knew it wasn’t helping him. She told him as much after he turned down yet another hot guy and he agreed he needed to get out of his funk and think about meeting someone new, needing to move on and stop dwelling on something that was never going to happen. 

On their third night out she pushed him to go and talk to a cute guy, he wasn’t eager to do it and he bitched and moaned before he went over but she insisted, once he got chatting to him though he really started to enjoy himself. His name was Simon and he was a paramedic, he was cute, friendly and was into him too. Callum fancied him and he was really easy to talk to. Before he knew it he’d been chatting to him for an hour and Whitney came over to tell him she was going to leave him to it, he asked if she needed him to walk her home but she pointed out a girlfriend she’d met up with and was going to go on somewhere else with her. He hugged her goodbye and went back to talking to Simon, Whitney paused at the door and looked back at him, checking one last time he was ok before she left and then she was off to party elsewhere, safe in the knowledge her bestie was going to let off some steam. 

Callum and Simon ended up kissing by the edge of the bar, Kathy came in to check on something with the manager and she spotted them both while she was chatting to her. It was a shock to see Callum with someone else already, attempting to move on, but she didn’t begrudge it at all, he deserved to have some fun and be happy. She instructed the manager to make sure the next few drinks he ordered were on the house, did what she had to do and then she went back home, leaving Callum in peace and hoping he had a good time. She smiled sadly to herself as she left, thinking what could have been with Ben and Callum had circumstances been different. 

As the night progressed Callum drank more, he was surprised when he went to get drinks that they were free but he didn’t question it and was just thankful for the alcohol. He was pleasantly drunk by the time Simon asked him if he wanted to go home with him and he eagerly agreed, kissing the other man and letting his hands run down to cup his arse. They made it back to his flat and ripped each others clothes off as they made their way to the bedroom, banging into furniture and doorways along the way.

Callum closed his eyes as Simon sunk to his knees in front of him and when he opened them again he saw brown eyes looking back up at him instead of blue. He remembered the way Ben looked in the same position, those eyes looking at him, the freckles splashed across his nose, the sinful lips stretched open. He shook the image out of his head, grabbed at Simon’s head to pull him up to stand and then kissed him hard before he pushed him back to land on the bed and then climbed on top of him.

They had a good time, both satisfied and breathless by the end and they fell asleep tangled up together in the sheets. They slept well and when Callum woke up in the morning he was thankful that he was sleeping next to another body rather than alone. Simon had his arm thrown over Callum’s stomach and his head was half on and off of his pillow. In the daylight he was better looking than he remembered from the night before and Callum definitely fancied him, he was glad he went home with him and was glad to have gotten back on the horse so to speak. He needed to remember to thank Whitney when he next spoke to her for giving him the push he so badly needed since he’d had fun despite not being that enthusiastic to start with back in the bar.

When Simon woke up he offered Callum breakfast, which he happily accepted since he was in no rush to get out of there. He cooked him scrambled egg on toast and they talked about how much fun they had the night before and whether they wanted to meet up again, Simon said he hadn’t had much luck meeting people and was always hoping he didn’t need to have another first date. Callum inwardly cringed to himself about all the first dates he’d already had with Ben, he wished the same thing but for an entirely different reason.

After they finished eating Callum asked if he could have a shower before he left, Simon grabbed him a spare towel as he went to the bathroom and hopped in. Before long the shower curtain was pulled back and Simon was stood admiring him, licking his lips as he climbed in to join him. He pushed Callum back up against the wall and soon he was making him come with hands gripping tight in his hair as his head moved fast and rough at the other man’s crotch.

They exchanged numbers as Callum left and he said he would give him a call to make a date. He meant it as well, Simon was handsome, nice and really great at sex, exactly the type of guy Callum should be looking for. He was interested in more than just a one night stand as well so that was definitely appealing, as much fun as Callum had had hooking up with different guys, he didn’t think it was something he could go back to doing all the time, not after Ben. As he was inputting the new number in his phone he scrolled through the names, hovering his finger over Ben’s name for a moment before he pressed on it and selected to delete it. He no longer needed it so why hang onto the past, then he saved Simon’s contact details and put the phone in his pocket. He kissed Simon as he left and the other man smiled at him as he walked away and then Callum was heading home back to the Vic. 

Simon didn’t live a million miles away from the Square and it was just a short tube ride for him to get back. He was doing the walk of shame getting home in the clothes he wore the night before but at least he was clean and not covered the stench of alcohol and sex, making him feel a little less ashamed and obvious than he might have been otherwise. It was getting onto midday by the time he was walking out of the Walford East tube station and heading back towards the pub. 

He turned the corner to walk down through the market and he was looking down at the ground as he walked, not paying attention to anyone or anything that was going on around him. Because he wasn’t looking where he was going he ended up bumping in to somebody, catching their shoulder with his and as he turned round to apologise he came face to face with Ben and Jay. His heart skipped a beat and he felt the butterflies trying to burst out through his stomach. It was the first time he’d seen him since the day he internally called the disaster date and he looked amazing. Even better looking if it was at all possible. 

Ben was looking back at Callum with an irritated look on his face, annoyed that some idiot was too busy in his own world that he bashed into him and he rubbed at the spot on his shoulder where their arms had slammed together. The other man was looking at him with a look of shock and Ben felt a flicker of something as he looked at him but couldn’t put his finger on it. Callum gathered his senses up and said a quick sorry as he looked between Ben and Jay and then put his head down and carried on walking back to the Vic, faster than he had been walking before he bumped into them. 

Ben watched as he walked away, trying to work something out in his mind but not quite being able to connect what it was he was thinking and feeling, there was something there but it just wasn’t coming to him. Jay looked at him, his brother was confused and was staring at Callum’s retreating form and after giving him a minute in his own thoughts he tapped him on the arm and told him they needed to get to going. Ben looked at him and nodded but his eyes were still half looking down the market, distracted by the departing figure of the man until he turned a corner and vanished from view. 

Ben allowed himself to be swept along by Jay to head in the opposite direction to where Callum went and they walked towards the Funeral Parlour which was where Jay worked part time along with the car lot. He let them both in and while Jay started to look through some paperwork Ben sat at an empty desk and put his feet up on it. He got his phone out to browse the internet, intending to kill some time while he waited for Jay to finish what he needed to do. He hesitated for a moment though and decided to scroll through his contacts instead, flicking through the list he stopped on a name and stared at it. Eventually he clicked on it and typed a message. 

Callum got back to the Vic and headed straight upstairs, Mick and Linda tried to say hi to him as he walked past them in the bar but after accidentally running into Ben he couldn’t face talking to anybody right now. He made it to his room, shut the door behind him and almost fell back against it, letting his head drop back against the solid wood. He closed his eyes and allowed himself a few deep breaths. He felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and he composed himself enough to reach in and pull it out, expecting it to be a message from Simon. He clicked on the envelope on the screen and was shocked to see a message from an unsaved number…

07630971629: Mary?


	14. Chapter 14

Callum freaked out when he received the text message from Ben. It was completely unexpected and threw him through the wringer. He’d accepted in his own mind that things with Ben were never going to happen. He knew it was a lost cause and had decided it was for the best that he didn’t see him anymore to save himself from the pain. But now he wasn’t so sure. Did Ben know who he was? Does Ben remember him? He scarcely wanted to allow himself to believe it, not being able to cope if he was wrong and it was just a fluke or a mistake. What if Ben had seen the name while scrolling through his phone and simply thought Mary was a woman he met and was trying to place where he knew her? That seemed a lot more logical an explanation than him suddenly being able to remember Callum, especially when they hadn’t seen each other in weeks. 

Callum knew he had to call Kathy, he needed to meet up with them all and ask what was going on with Ben lately and whether there was any progress with his memory that he didn’t know about. He hadn’t spoken to any of them, not since Kathy came to see him in the Vic, deciding that a clean break was the best idea for all of them with little to no chance of Ben and Callum having to cross paths again. Well as clean a break as they could get in such a small area where they all lived and worked. 

Kathy was surprised when she got his call, not expecting to hear from the young man again, but when he explained that he’d just had a text from Ben she agreed that they definitely needed to talk. She said she would call the others around but she didn’t let on what it was about, preferring to have the conversation face to face with them, not thinking that news like this was something they could talk about over the phone and needing to tell them both at the same time. This was pretty big news and after all. 

It took a lot of deliberation but eventually Callum decided to not reply to Ben’s message. He spent so long staring at his phone, reading the message over and over, he typed a message and hovered his finger over the send button before deleting it all. He repeated the action a few times before he put his phone to one side and ignored it, counting down the minutes til he was going to meet with Kathy. He needed to talk to the family again before he even thought about reconnecting with him, not wanting to start something his heart couldn’t cope with. If he started to see him again with the same outcome it was too painful to consider. But what if. What if Ben really had started to remember things, remember him. He saw him in the street and less than ten minutes later he text him, it couldn’t be a coincidence could it, it had to mean something. 

Less than an hour after running into each other in the market, Callum was walking into Kathy’s home to talk to her, Jay and Lola. It was the first time he’d been in the house, all the previous times he’d met with them it was at the cafe or in the pub, usually in a public place as Ben was normally at the house with Lexi. This time he had taken her out to the aquarium for a few hours, leaving the coast clear for them to talk in peace. Callum took a moment to look at the family photos dotted around the living room and stopped in front of a picture of Ben with a little girl sitting on his lap. He looked so happy and he wondered if it was taken before or after the accident. He tried to imagine how Ben was before, seemingly not a care in the world, just loving life and watching his daughter grow up.

They were all sitting at the table waiting for him to sit down with them but allowing him a few minutes to take in the photos, learning more about Ben’s life through pictures. When he turned around from the Ben and Lexi photo he had a smile on his face, seeing Ben as a father for the first time made him feel all warm and fuzzy, knowing the little girl had a loving dad, something he was always missing in his own life and glad that Ben had his own little family even if he wasn’t a part of it. Eventually he sat down and they all looked at him, waiting for him to speak first and finding out why they had been called together. Jay and Lola believed that whatever this thing with Ben and Callum was it was now over, they had no reason to think Callum would have any reason to talk to them again. 

“So… this morning Ben text me”

Jay and Lola’s mouths dropped open, the surprise on their faces evident and totally not expecting for Callum to tell them that. 

“I bumped into Jay and Ben in the market and 10 minutes later he text me”

“What did it say?”

Callum looked a bit embarrassed before he answered Lola’s question… “Mary”

“Mary?” Lola asked confused, “What’s that meant to mean?”

Callum went on to explain the meaning behind it. The day Ben asked him for his number at the Vic his hair had been sticking up in the air and Ben was joking that he looked like Mary from the film. He hadn’t mentioned it since and Callum assumed he’d forgotten about it like he forgets about so much. But he must have saved him in his phone as Mary, cheeky little shit. Lola laughed and said she can imagine Ben doing that, he’s always been like that, giving people nicknames when he puts them in his phone, or at least he used to. Then Jay interrupted with a thought. 

“That song…. He’s always singing a song, it’s from that film isn’t it”

“What film?” Kathy asked, not knowing about movies and the songs associated with them, completely lost about what they were all talking about. 

“That buttercup song, he’s been humming and singing it for ages….” Jay looked at Callum, a look of realisation coming over his face, “Ever since he asked you out.” Callum was looking back at him, equally as shocked by the same conclusion that Jay had come to. “He remembers you”. 

Callum felt like someone had pulled a rug out from under him, he’d cut all contact with Ben, distancing himself in an attempt to stop his heart from being hurt and it was for nothing. Ben remembered him, maybe not completely but he knew who he was. Seeing him in the market triggered a memory, even though the last time they’d seen each other had been weeks ago. What if he was still seeing him regularly and jogging his memory daily, Ben could know who he was properly by now, they could be something. He cursed himself for giving up so easily, wondering where they could be right now if he hadn’t been so weak. As if she could sense what he was thinking Kathy reached over and put her hand on his hands that were sitting on the table in front of him. 

“Don’t be hard on yourself Callum, you did what you had to do for you. Don’t ever blame yourself for trying to protect yourself. We knew he was happier in himself but even we didn’t know the extent of how his memory was, and we live with him. You had no way of knowing”.

He nodded at her and knew she was right, maybe this is what needed to happen, for them to both have space and for Ben’s mind to have the chance to make the connections by itself. Maybe Callum needed these few weeks to get his head around things and to know once and for all what he truly felt and wanted. He’d had a nice time with Simon, could see the easy path with him, but even as they went to bed together Callum was unable to shake the image and feeling of Ben touching him and leaning over him out of his mind. Callum blushed slightly at the memory of him and Ben at the car lot, imagining that Ben’s loved ones were sitting there seeing into his brain, watching it playing out like a home movie. 

They were all looking at him and smiling, thankfully not being able to imagine what he was thinking about, but just pleased with the realisation that Ben was finally starting to get better. He was making new memories after over a year of frustration and pain and they finally saw the light at the end of the tunnel. They were so pleased that the tiny nugget of hope the doctor gave them originally was coming true, happy that they never gave up on him. 

The love they felt for Callum in that moment was overwhelming, this boy was bringing Ben back to them and they would never be able to repay him for it. But looking at him now, they didn’t think they needed to, Callum looked as though he was going to burst with happiness. He’d started to cry and was looking around at the others with the most honest and genuine smile on his face, like he couldn’t believe that he was lucky enough to be there, in this room, sharing the moment with the people that loved Ben the most. 

None of them were entirely sure where to go from here or how to reintroduce Callum into Ben’s life but they all agreed it was what needed to happen. The only reason Callum had withdrawn is now defunct and he could think of nothing he wanted to do more than to run and find Ben and have a ridiculous rom com moment in the middle of the square. He knew that was out of the question of course, but the joy and excitement he was feeling in that moment made him feel like it was possible someday and he could work with that.

For the first time in a long time everybody felt like Ben had a future and they knew that future was with Callum. 


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok last chapter. Thanks guys for the comments and kudos, I wasn't expecting them all to be honest. I thought this was going to be a short 5 chapter cute and funny story, but once I started writing it I realised that was never going to happen. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy the end of the story and I never say never about revisiting this version of Ballum again at some point.

It was decided amongst them all that they should try to do things a little different this time to how they tried to do it before. This time they wanted Callum and Ben to run into each other randomly around the Square without arranging anything beforehand, hoping that the casual approach of them meeting would be better than forcing it. The most successful dates they had before were the ones that they didn’t plan. When Ben asked Callum out in the Vic, Callum was oblivious to him going in and it was a last minute decision on Ben’s part to go for a lunchtime drink, and when they spent the whole day together it was because of a chance meeting outside the Minute Mart that set it off. 

Callum tried to not overthink it but whenever he went out he was always looking for Ben, hoping to run into him again but after a few days it started to feel like a losing battle. He failed to see the man anywhere he went and he felt a sense of disappointment creeping in, starting to believe it was never going to happen, it’s almost as it the universe was conspiring to keep them apart at this point. He text Lola on the fourth day of not seeing Ben and she told him to chill out. The more he was thinking about it the more tense he was going to end up and that wasn’t going to help anybody, Callum remembered how he nearly psyched himself out before and knew she was right. They’d all decided the best course of action was for things to progress naturally and she reminded him that this wasn’t time sensitive, Ben had contacted him after weeks of not seeing him, what’s a few more days going to hurt. He knew she was talking sense and he told his brain to stop stressing itself out. 

One night, a week after the text, Whitney asked him if he wanted to go out, to his shame he hadn’t been seeing his best friend as much as he should have been, he hadn’t seen her since that night he went home with Simon. She’d not been in work all week so hadn’t any idea of what’s been happening, Callum has been spending so much time focused on Ben and talking with his family that he hasn’t really spoken to his best friend in all that time. She was hoping he was moving on and starting to get back on the horse with that Simon bloke, not knowing about what’s really been happening. Talking of Simon… he’d called Callum the day after they spent the night together and Callum apologised, said he had a great time but he was still hung up on somebody else. Simon was such a nice guy that he said it was ok and he hoped that things worked out for him, wishing him happiness. In another life Callum thought he could see him being very happy with someone like him and he knew that he was going to make someone a wonderful boyfriend someday, he was sad it couldn’t be him but his heart belonged elsewhere. 

Callum didn’t fancy the hustle and bustle of the Albert that night, but he did want to meet up with Whitney so he suggested they have a drink at the Vic instead, start off downstairs for a few and then migrate upstairs to curl up on the sofa and watch a shit movie together with popcorn and snacks, gossiping and catching up on each others lives. She agreed immediately, missing her best friend and wanting to hear all the juicy details about that guy he went home with the last time they were out together. She met someone herself when she went on to a club and she couldn’t wait to fill Callum in on her life too. It had been a long time since they’d had a night in together, neither of them wanting to go out on the pull or getting bladdered this time. 

When they met up Whitney was very surprised to hear that Ben was back in the picture, she’d hoped that after she left him with the cute guy at the Albert he would be ready to move on and she cursed the universe for sending Ben along to ruin things again. She had nothing against the guy but she was just worried about the effect it would have on her best friend if it all went wrong again. She was genuinely scared for his health and mental state, thinking he wouldn’t survive it if the other man broke his heart. He’d been in such a state the last time that it wasn’t unreasonable for her to be worried about him. She only wanted him to be happy and she worried that he never could be that with Ben. 

Callum understood her reservations, he had them too and he wanted to protect his heart as much as she did, but after he explained everything about him beginning to remember him, the film, the song, the text… she started to come round and aside from telling him to be careful she wanted to be supportive for him. After they finished discussing his dramas and complicated love life they got round to talking about the man Whitney had met, she thought he could be the one and he was so pleased for her. She’d been through some crap in her life and he thought she deserved happiness more than anyone else he knew. Months ago, when they were dating each other, who would have thought that they’d be sitting here talking about the other people they each had in their lives and the futures they could see for themselves. They were really pleased for one another and promised each other they were going to do better at keeping in touch and spending more time together, with everything that’s been happening they’d both been a bit shit at that. 

They ended up having a good night, starting out with a couple of free drinks, thanks Mick, and then going upstairs to have a few more while they appropriately watched ‘There’s something about Mary’, laughing at the ridiculousness of the film and laughing extra hard at the scene with with Mary’s ‘hair gel’. It was crazy to think that such a silly film could be the reason for Callum’s possible future happiness with Ben. When the movie finished they put on another and as that one finished, the Carters shut up the pub and came upstairs to head to bed. They walked past the living room and bid them goodnight, noticing that Whitney had fallen asleep leaning on Callum. He waved as they went by and then woke her up, turning off the tv and helping her to stand up to lead her to his room. They fell asleep hugging each other like they do so often, wondering how many more times they will be doing this if they both have a significant other from now on. 

In the morning they joined Mick and Linda in the kitchen for breakfast, it was the first time in a long time that Callum and Whitney weren’t nursing a hangover after a night together and it was rather pleasant being able to have a proper conversation without feeling the need to rush for the toilet every five minutes. Callum had already told his surrogate parents about the latest Ben development and the meal was dominated with excited chatter about the future and what it may bring. This was the first day in a long time that Callum felt genuinely positive about life, feeling that things really could go his way and hoping that everything would work out the way he, and everyone else wanted them to.

Whitney headed home after breakfast and Callum cleared up and washed all the dirty plates and cooking things up and cleaned the kitchen, wanting to show the Carters how much he appreciated them after how much they had done for him, especially lately when he perhaps hasn’t been the best lodger with his mood swings and dramas. When it was time for Callum’s shift to start at lunchtime he was all bright eyed and bushy tailed, the most upbeat and enthusiastic he had been feeling since he moved into the Vic. All the customers noticed his good mood and he had more people offering to buy him drinks because of his beaming and cheerful smile that day than he ever had before. He gratefully accepted the first drink but was soon having to turn them down or else he’d be pissed by the end of his shift. 

He’d been working for a couple of hours when Ben walked in. Callum looked up as he entered the pub and his eyes were glued to him as he walked towards the bar. He looked amazing, but then when didn’t he. It was the first time he’d really seen him in weeks, if you discount the run in in the market that Callum had been so desperate to run away from that he hadn’t fully appreciated how good Ben was looking lately. Callum didn’t think he’d ever seen the other man look so handsome, his hair was slightly longer than the last time and Callum swore there were more freckles on his face. His heart was beating hard in his chest looking at the other man and he tried his hardest to not break out in a big, scary demented smile, not wanting to come across as a nut job and wanting to seem as casual as possible even if inwardly he felt like his heart was going to burst out through his rib cage. 

Ben headed towards the area where Callum was stood behind the bar, waiting to serve customers. He caught sight of the tall guy with a cute smile when he walked into the pub and felt a fluttering in his tummy instantly. He had a fleeting memory in his head of Cameron Diaz but it disappeared as soon as it appeared and he couldn’t make the connection between a Hollywood actress and an East end barman. As he reached the bar the guy gave him a bright smile which made his eyes sparkle and gave him the cutest dimples, Ben felt that flutter getting stronger. 

“Have we met?”

“Maybe, I’ve been here for a while now”

“You look really familiar”

“Yeah, you do too”.

They stood and chatted at the bar for a while, Ben ordering two drinks and telling the barman to take one for himself too, there was no way Callum was turning this one down so he poured himself a rum and coke to steady his nerves. When Ben passed over a note to pay, their hands brushed together briefly and they both felt a small jolt from it. Ben looked at him from under his eyelashes and as Callum smiled at him it felt like the butterflies in his stomach had begun to try and escape. After a while Jay came in to join Ben and he smiled at Callum again as he picked up the drinks and went to sit at a table with his brother, telling him that he’d catch him later over his shoulder. While he drank and chatted to Jay, Callum noticed him looking over once or twice, and each time he did they locked eyes as Callum was looking right back at him. 

Things continued like that for a while. After that initial ‘first’ meeting in the pub it began to feel as though they were always running into each other. Each time Callum stepped out the pub door Ben seemed to be walking past on his way to the cafe or towards the car lot. And now it felt as though the younger man had started going into the pub most lunchtimes as well. It got to the point that pretty much every time they met Ben seemed to start remembering Callum that little bit more. The spark of recognition in Ben’s face was soon replaced with a familiar smile each time he set eyes on the older man. 

Callum started to realise that Ben was definitely remembering him even if he didn’t necessarily know what his name was, but the fact he was making an effort to go to the pub each day meant the knew there was a reason that he wanted to go to the pub. On some occasions they flirted, others they asked each other out, once or twice they ended up in the toilets, Ben pushing Callum up against the wall and kissing him passionately, hands scrunched up in his shirt and Callum’s hand gripping onto Ben’s face, holding him there as their tongues licked into each other’s mouths. Callum enjoyed those lunchtimes especially. 

It took about a month of these almost daily meetings before one day, as they walked past each other in the market, Ben shouted out a cheery “morning Callum” across the road as he was on his way into the cafe to visit his mum. He didn’t stop as he said it but continued walking on his way, not even realising that anything was unique about the day, Callum however stopped dead where he was stood, utterly shocked that Ben not only knew who he was but also that he knew his name, completely unprompted and just throwing it out there like it was something he did every morning.

His heart beat loudly in his chest and he tried not to freak out, trying to decide whether he should follow Ben into the cafe or leave it. He didn’t want to push it and was worried that if he pursued him then Ben would have forgotten he knew him by the time he spoke to him again, he didn’t think he could take it if he bound after him full of excitement to have Ben look blankly back at him, his name just a fleeting thought in his mind that drifted straight back out again. In the end he decided to leave it, figuring that if Ben wanted to talk to him then he would have stopped to talk, not just said hi in passing and carried on walking. It was hard but Callum continued on his way and left it for the day, texting Kathy to let her know of the breakthrough and she was equally as excited.

It was the new normal, when Ben saw him now he remembered him, greeting him by name most mornings. He still didn’t fully know what Callum was to him but he had at least made a space in his memory for him, taking up a place amongst the things he held most dear and knew before the accident. Ben’s family were over the moon with the latest news, amazed by the fact Ben knew who Callum was now and they were ecstatic that he had even started to talk about the other man with them, telling them about the cute guy who worked at the pub. It was the first time he’d made new memories since the accident and it was a massive deal for all of them, giving them the hope of Ben’s recovery that they’d been hanging onto since the start. 

Eventually it got to a stage where things needed to be addressed, Kathy decided it was time to try and explain to Ben again about the accident and head injury and booked an appointment to take him to the consultant who made the original diagnosis. Over the past year and a bit they had been to visit him many times, hoping that what he could tell them would change, but it never did. They mostly went on the days they had had to tell Ben about his past, the young man insisting on talking to a doctor and hearing it from the horses mouth himself. The doctor sadly explained his condition to him each time, giving him the tiniest seed of hope he could get better and knowing the next time he saw Ben, they would be having the exact same conversation again. 

On the morning of this hospital visit Ben freaked out, he was scared about everything he was being told and upset that he’d lost so much of his life that he didn’t remember. Finding out that you lived over a year of your life without knowing what happened, it was hard to understand how it was even possible he’d been living his life with no memory of it, but it was helped by the fact he knew he was remembering things now and his current life wasn’t completely blank anymore. It still hurt that he’d missed out on so much of his daughter growing up though, but Lola assured him she’d taken hundreds of photos and videos along the way so he would still be able to see her life in the missing time he had. She always hoped he would get better and so kept records of everything about their daughter for him, knowing he would want to see it someday, she was so pleased that that day was finally getting closer and he’d be able to appreciate everything she’d kept sooner rather than later. 

Later that day when they returned from the hospital Ben was surprisingly calm, they’d had good news and the doctor was positive that his brain injury was healing finally and his memory was only going to improve from now on, continuing to make and store new memories and information. Everybody felt the relief of what the doctor said, wanting to celebrate and party, but they knew they needed to wait and see, not wanting to jinx anything. After spending most of the day stressed and upset about finding out about his condition he was still tense, but started to relax when his family tried to fill him in on the things in his life that had been important over the last year or so. He was relieved he had them to look out for them and was thankful for everything they had done for him.

The following day when Ben woke up he actually remembered pieces of the previous day, he knew about the head injury and that he had spent time at a hospital appointment, he also remembered the good news about his memory too and all of his loved ones were over the moon with the development, knowing once and for all that Ben was finally on the mend. It made them all so happy now that they knew he had a chance at life and love, a proper relationship and a future. They didn’t say anything about Callum though, wanting Ben to remember their relationship alone, not wanting to push anything too soon for him. 

Kathy let Callum know everything that had happened over the previous couple of days and he had to stop himself from rushing over to their house to join in with their excitement. He knew it was still the right thing to do to let Ben’s memory work at its own pace, especially where Callum was concerned, and this guy he sometimes remembered he kissed or made a date with might look a bit strange joining in with a private family moment. It was difficult but he knew it was a good idea, what’s a few more days after how long it’s taken to get where they were now. 

A couple of days after Ben found out everything about his past and medical history he walked into the Vic and looked to see if he could find the tall man with beautiful blue eyes. Upon seeing Callum behind the bar he went over and gestured to him to move over to the corner, out of the gaze of the other customers and trying to get a bit of privacy for the two of them. Callum followed the instruction to where Ben wanted him to go and looked at him confused, wondering what was wrong. It wasn’t often Ben came in like that and walked straight up to him without any sort of introduction or hello first and Ben was looking at him with a sense of urgency. 

“This is going to sound weird, but have we had sex?”

Whatever Callum was expecting Ben to say, it certainly wasn’t that, he suddenly felt very shy and embarrassed, feeling a bit ashamed that he’d slept with a man who didn’t have any recollection of it. He was looking down at the ground and couldn’t look Ben in the eye and that told Ben all he needed to know. The pink flush creeping up the neck of the other man who was avoiding his gaze was a dead giveaway and Ben thought it was really bloody cute. 

“We did didn’t we”

Callum was still looking down but nodded his head softly, scared of what Ben was going to say to him and worried that he was going to be angry or scared of him. He would if he was in his position, this person pretending to be his friend was lying to him and he wouldn’t blame Ben if he never wanted to speak to him again. He was so lost in his own bad thoughts, thinking the worst, that he almost missed that Ben was talking to him, still looking down because he was unable to look the other man in the eyes, afraid of what he might see there. 

“Earlier I walked into the office at the car lot and I suddenly couldn’t get the image of you naked and laying underneath me out of my head, it was so vivid. Then it was like a movie playing in my mind and I saw us kissing in the Albert and in the toilets here and it all felt so real. Callum? Are we dating?”

Callum nodded again and took a deep breath before he raised his head to look at Ben, worried he was going to see anger on the other man’s face. But when he looked up, Ben was smiling at him, a soft and shy smile with a twinkle in his eyes, and then he started to bite on his lip nervously. Callum smiled back and wasn’t quite sure what to say, Ben was clearly not angry but he still didn’t know how this conversation was going to go. 

Just then a familiar song came on the jukebox and Callum looked around to see who put it on, Jay was stood next to the machine while Lola and Kathy were sitting at a table nearby watching what was happening on the other side of the pub with him and Ben. Callum looked back to Ben as the lyrics of their song filled the Vic. ‘I need you, more than anyone darlin’ you know that I have from the start…’ Callum thought to himself how oddly apt the words were, knowing how he felt about Ben since the second he set eyes on him, he was lost in the lyrics when Ben spoke…

“Callum Highway, will you go out with me”

Callum couldn’t keep the smile from spreading across his face and after a minute to process the current situation and trying to believe that this was really happening and not a dream, he was then walking around the edge of the bar so he was stood in front of the other man. He put his hand out to Ben’s cheek and brushed it gently with his thumb, Ben nudged his face into the touch like a cat, closing his eyes briefly before opening them again to look at Callum. 

It felt as though they were both frozen in time, staring into each other’s blue eyes, dancing with stars, bright and glistening from the tears of joy and pure happiness, especially Callum who couldn’t believe this was real life, that he was stood in front of Ben and he knew they were more to each other than a casual acquaintance. Callum was looking into sparkling blue eyes, still with his hand on Ben’s cheek, still making contact with him before he leaned down to place a gentle kiss on his lips. Ben kissed him back gently at first but then reached his hand up to Callum’s head and pulled him closer to him, depending the kiss and feeling how familiar this was, knowing that this felt right, they both did. Eventually they pulled apart and heard the faint cooing and clapping of both Ben’s family and the Carters, all blissfully happy at the unfolding events before them. Ben pulled back from their embrace to check that Callum’s answer was a yes to the date and Callum pulled him back in for another kiss in response. 

It took the sound of wolf whistles breaking through the loved up haze to finally make them pull apart. Callum was never one for public shows of affection, especially not during his lunchtime shift with a half full pub and stone cold sober. He started to blush slightly at people watching them, and he looked down at the ground a bit embarrassed. Ben reached his hand out to grasp at Callum’s and pulled it to his chest. The taller man raised his gaze so he was looking Ben in the face and was instantly reassured and felt more relaxed with the younger man smiling back at him, clearly not bothered in the least that they had an audience. He sensed Callum’s discomfort though so leaned up and whispered in his ear, “do you have somewhere to go?” Callum was instantly covered in goosebumps, the feeling of Ben’s breath on his ear did funny things to him, so he tightened the grip of his hand on Ben’s and pulled him through the door to the back and lead him upstairs to his room. 

The following morning their limbs were tangled together, the sheets were twisted and half hanging off the bed and they were both covered in the crusty mess from a whole night of making love. When Callum woke up he looked at the man sleeping sprawled across his chest, his hand went to stroke his hair and he froze suddenly, worried that if Ben woke up he wouldn’t remember who he was. As if he could sense he was being watched, Ben woke up and saw that Callum was awake. Ben smiled and moved his head up to give him a kiss, then he pulled back to look at him and said “Morning Mary”, Callum burst out laughing in relief and kissed Ben back, happy to finally be waking up in the arms of the man he loved. 


End file.
